French President Jacques Chirac is visiting Senegal, a place that is so luxurious that it offers two pickpockets for every tourist. While there, France’s ‘Appeaser-in-Chief’ saw his security guards and some reporters get pickpocketed.

Chirac’s guards, who have put their pomposity on the line and pledged to sacrifice their federally funded theater tickets if necessary to protect their leader, managed to keep the pickpockets away from the French President. Whew. Chirac’s wallet, containing drivers license, family photos, membership card to the “Bordeaux of the Month Club”, and Saddam Hussein’s cell phone number, is safe.


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