Today’s column at WorldNetDaily mocks the Oscars just a tad, if that’s even possible. There are so many people and groups wandering the streets who can act just as good, or better, than the Morgan Freemans and Cate Blanchetts of the world, but who all to often go without being recognized with an award.

Give a read to “The 1st Annual Bologna Awards“, and you’ll see that they’re much more practical than the Oscars.

Speaking of the Academy Awards, how was Chris Rock? Unlike some comedians, who can clean it up and not lose a step, Rock, unable to use the “For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge” acronym, seemed like a boxer with his hands tied behind his back.

Of course there were the obligatory Bush jokes, but you have to do that at the Oscars. Not picking on Bush when you’re in Hollywood is like going to Orlando without seeing Disney World.

The best line of the night, besides “The show’s finally over now”, had to be Rock’s introduction of a couple of presenters:

“You won’t be able to take your eyes off of these next four presenters: Penelope Cruz and Salma Hayek.”

I love how they’re trying to “hurry the show along” by just wading into the audience and handing out awards. Talk about getting snubbed. “Mr. Eastwood, come up on stage and get your award, you genius!” Then they cut to the “Best lighting director”, he stands up, a kid runs by with a microphone and an Oscar, a few words are said, then he sits back down. It’s like Carson’s old “Stump the band” bit.

At least that show is done for another year. The limo convoy back to Malibu arrived safely, just after 2 a.m., and they can all start plotting how to try for more Oscars. I might even try to see one of the movies this year… but I’m not counting on it.

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