Monthly Archives: June 2005

High school's name misspelled in diplomas — Nobody really that surprised

A Pennsylvania high school is having to send out new diplomas to their graduates because, in the body of the diploma, “Northampton” was spelled “Northhampton.”

The school’s website says that the mistake was the fault of the printer in Minneapolis.

Soon, however, all graduates will have the new diplomas in hand, as concrete proof that they graduated from “Northampton, Pensillvanya.”

High school’s name misspelled in diplomas — Nobody really that surprised

A Pennsylvania high school is having to send out new diplomas to their graduates because, in the body of the diploma, “Northampton” was spelled “Northhampton.”

The school’s website says that the mistake was the fault of the printer in Minneapolis.

Soon, however, all graduates will have the new diplomas in hand, as concrete proof that they graduated from “Northampton, Pensillvanya.”

John Edwards calls for higher minimum wage for Michigan workers, and if that doesn't help, sue somebody

Have you ever been an ambulance driver and gotten the feeling you were being followed? Many of them in Lansing, Michigan felt that way yesterday as former VP candidate John Edwards was in town to call for Michigan to raise its minimum wage.

Living a scant few miles upwind from the site of Edwards’ speech, I caught the smell of weasel in the air immediately. Edwards, who narrowly lost the “best hair” award among the Democrat presidential candidates to John Kerry, wants Michigan to raise the minimum wage from $5.15 to $7.15.

Edwards called Michigan’s minimum wage “a national embarrassment.” If it is indeed a “national embarrassment,” it’s on the list below a slithering trial attorney from another state coming here and telling us what to do, the Kerry campaign, Dick Durbin and Ted Kennedy, and genital herpes.

During his speech, Edwards asked the crowd to scream “yes” if they demanded a higher minimum wage, and/or if they’ve ever suffered a neck injury from a passenger-side airbag.

From the article:

Edwards and other speakers at the Capitol rally, including Michigan AFL-CIO President Mark Gaffney, said a higher minimum wage would improve the state’s
economy because families would spend more once they had larger paychecks.

Wow, are John Edwards and company talking about “trickle-down economics”? Somewhere, Ronald Reagan is laughing so hard that jelly beans are coming out his nose.

The problem is that “trickle-down” can’t be forced. Not outlined for convenient reasons is how many jobs will be lost if the minimum wage is raised. Sure families will spend more if they have larger paychecks, but how much will they spend with no paycheck. Some guy somewhere will go from making a couple hundred bucks a week, to nothing, all because some Democrats “helped” him.

Some of these people really need to read “Econ for Kidz.”

John Edwards calls for higher minimum wage for Michigan workers, and if that doesn’t help, sue somebody

Have you ever been an ambulance driver and gotten the feeling you were being followed? Many of them in Lansing, Michigan felt that way yesterday as former VP candidate John Edwards was in town to call for Michigan to raise its minimum wage.

Living a scant few miles upwind from the site of Edwards’ speech, I caught the smell of weasel in the air immediately. Edwards, who narrowly lost the “best hair” award among the Democrat presidential candidates to John Kerry, wants Michigan to raise the minimum wage from $5.15 to $7.15.

Edwards called Michigan’s minimum wage “a national embarrassment.” If it is indeed a “national embarrassment,” it’s on the list below a slithering trial attorney from another state coming here and telling us what to do, the Kerry campaign, Dick Durbin and Ted Kennedy, and genital herpes.

During his speech, Edwards asked the crowd to scream “yes” if they demanded a higher minimum wage, and/or if they’ve ever suffered a neck injury from a passenger-side airbag.

From the article:

Edwards and other speakers at the Capitol rally, including Michigan AFL-CIO President Mark Gaffney, said a higher minimum wage would improve the state’s
economy because families would spend more once they had larger paychecks.

Wow, are John Edwards and company talking about “trickle-down economics”? Somewhere, Ronald Reagan is laughing so hard that jelly beans are coming out his nose.

The problem is that “trickle-down” can’t be forced. Not outlined for convenient reasons is how many jobs will be lost if the minimum wage is raised. Sure families will spend more if they have larger paychecks, but how much will they spend with no paycheck. Some guy somewhere will go from making a couple hundred bucks a week, to nothing, all because some Democrats “helped” him.

Some of these people really need to read “Econ for Kidz.”

Absence of hockey causes some Canadian marriages to go completely nuts — literally

The goalie is out of the net. Canada has become only the third country in the world to officially recognize gay marriage— along with the Netherlands and Belgium. The U.K. is not officially on that list, but the powdered wigs, red coats, and heeled shoes for men prove that they’ve been “honorary members” of that group for quite some time.

This is sure to rekindle the debate on the gay marriage issue in the United States, but for the immediate future, expect the line at Customs to get a lot more color coordinated.

By the way, the groom and groom are registered at “Pucks, Bath & Beyond.”

Speaking of homosexual Canucks, I recently ran across their “logo”, if you will… it’s a rainbow pattern over the country’s symbol. I think this is called a “Gay-ple leaf”, but I’m not sure:

Reaching into the emailbag

This week, my “in” box filled up like the cast of Cagney & Lacy’s reunion show wrap party at Old Country Buffet.

Michael writes concerning my column “Armed Robe-ery” and the Supreme Court ruling stripping private property rights:

The Supreme Court actually did us a favor, by EMPOWERING the STATES themselves, power the states always had, but never really BROADCAST. The way this country was originally designed was for SMALL power to the FEDERAL government, and BIG power to the STATES. The Court simply reinforced that idea once again. Hopefully, some people will be smart enough to see that, and use it toward other things that will be FOR the people.

Here’s part of my response: I’m sure that analysis of the ruling will continue by people brighter than I, but even if you’re correct, then the fact that my house was taken from me by the state government rather than the federal government would be of little consolation to me.

Curt and/or Wanda said…

Dear Doug , You must run for office, I would support and garner support for whatever office you chose.

Thanks, but it’d never happen. I’m honest, have read the Constitution, never cheated on my wife, never killed anybody, never been in the KKK, never been a slimeball trial attorney, and don’t crave power. That job would fit me like spandex pants on Michael Moore. Plus, I’m not sure if my campaign slogan of “Building a bridge to the 18th century when government knew its place” would fly these days.

Marvanna said while grabbing a pitchfork…

The Supreme Court needs a cleaning out just like the halls of Congress. Where are they leading us, to a socialist society? It’s a scary future with our rights being peeled away every day with that crowd. Unfortunately, they don’t live by the rules they force on us. They live in another world (their own)! What this country needs is a revolution to take back our country and God-given rights. NOW!

Hey, I agree, which is the real reason I’d never run for office now– a fear reliving Mussolini’s last day. Hanging from a lamp post with Marvanna beating me with a hunk of pipe isn’t my idea of noble public service.

December of 2003 terror alert based on CIA guy hallucinating while watching Al-Jazeera

Lisa Myers, who is sort of NBC’s version of CNN’s Candy Crowley after a successful month on Atkins, reports for MSNBC that the big terror alert in December of 2003 was based on a CIA analyst seeing what he thought was secret code being telecast on Al Jazeera.

This caused many cancelled flights and the terror alert level to go from “nothing at all I can do about it anyway” to “still nothing I can do about it.”

The “code” turned out to only be the winning numbers in the “JihadBall Lotto” or something like that.

Back to the drawing board.

It took several weeks for the government to take the U.S. off “red” on the following chart:

Book update

My first book is finally finished. Whew! Small amounts of polish-it-up editing are now taking place.

It should be out by the end of the summer, unless the Supreme Court takes eminent domain over it by deciding that the book’s space on the shelf would “better serve the public” if it were a Starbucks or Bed, Bath and Beyond.

The tentative title and subtitles are:

“Because that’s the way God decided to do it!”

A conservative father fields confusing questions from his confused kids about a confusing world
Inadequate explanations of politics, parenting, economics, war, technology, and the future of the human race

Once I get samples from the chapters picked out closer to the release date, I’ll post ’em here.

"The Ten Commandments" replaced by "The Five Commandants"

So many of our laws are based on the Ten Commandments, but we have to continue to pretend they’re not.

In another 5-to-4 ruling, led by pretty much the usual gang of unconstitutional bungweasels, the Supreme Court has decided that the Ten Commandments can’t be displayed in courtrooms. You still have to swear on a Bible to tell the truth, but I’m guessing that’s coming up on the docket real soon, and the oath will soon become:

“Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help insert deity of your choosing here, and if you choose not to recognize any particular deity, promise to try to recall the facts as you know them despite the fact that you have no reason not to lie?”

The irony is that the Supreme Court’s anti-Chrisian crusades has become a regular visit to the Church of the Non-Believer. A place where words of discouragement are the daily sermon, and everyone tithes 20 percent of their time to denying God a place in national discourse. In other words, the Court’s quest has become everything they claim to stand against – a religion practiced in public.