California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger said he will veto a gay marriage bill that passed through the state legislature on Tuesday. The gay marriage bill Terminator said the bill would conflict with the will of voters when they approved Prop 22 last year.

It’s at times like these that the left really wish they could have saved Gray Davis, but not even famed intern Mountie Dudley-Do-Wrong and his uncommon-law wife, Bill and Hillary, could save a man who was ranking a notch below “herpes” on the approval list.

Now, in true liberal tradition, the courts will ride to the rescue to veto the veto. My guess is that, somehow, some way, California’s Ninth Circuit Court gets involved in this.

The Ninth Appellate is quite a collection. It’s as if Michael Moore and Noam Chomsky had love children after a torrid affair on the Isle of Numbskull, and sent them off to law school.

You may remember the Ninth Circuit as the one that ruled that the Pledge of Allegiance is unconstitutional when recited in public-school classrooms, because it contains the phrase “under God.” The ruling applied to nine Western states – 10 if you counted “shock.”

Then, they delayed the voting in California’s recall election. That ruling was, like many of their other decisions, superseded by people who weren’t brain damaged by constant over-the-head beatings with a hardcover coffee-table edition of Karl Marx’s “Bad Ideas: Volume I” .

Frequently turned away by higher courts, the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals often ends up as the judicial equivalent of the overzealous “lets get them panties off” hand of a horny teenage boy with his stuffy date on prom night – slapped away in abject failure and embarrassment.

The Court was back at it again in late 2003, ruling 2-1 that detainees at the Guantanamo Bay Naval Base in Cuba should have access to the American court system and lawyers. In a way, I agreed. Terrorist suspects should have ready access to the American court system – by moving them all into the homes of some of these judges on the Ninth Circuit.

To the Ninth Circuit, the Guantanamo detainees deserve the best defense your money can buy. You, on the other hand, will only be able to afford representation from your Uncle Earl, who once had half a semester of business law at Paducah Junior College.

It’s a good thing these judges weren’t around in the ’40s, or else the Nuremberg trials would have ground to a screeching halt with the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals running things. Once they were told that the steps leading to the courthouse weren’t properly swept, which made Hermann Goering take a tumble and impale himself on the “good luck swastika” he kept in his shirt pocket, he would have been released and awarded $4 million for pain and suffering.

This would have encouraged the likes of Speer, Hess, von Ribbentrop, Keitel, et al, to follow in the goosesteps of Goering. Knowing the mindset of the judges, they could have easily played on their sympathy by claiming the allies intentionally inflicted shell-shock, or pointed out that their captors served them only milk to drink, even though it was made known they were lactose intolerant. Their fear of heights, along with pre-existing conditions of vertigo, would have been frighteningly aggravated by continual threats of hanging, and lawsuits would be filed against “big tobacco,” claiming many Nazi crimes to be entirely the fault of “nicotine rage.”

My guess is that these same judges will soon be messing with Arnold’s veto. After all, if the majority of people are for something, it must be a bad idea, because to the educated ivory tower liberal, there can’t be that many smart people.

Homosexual lobby, don’t give up hope, the courts are on your side, even though the majority of voters aren’t.

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