Gore's New Film: Al's Sweating, So It Must Be About Global Warming

Al Gore has a movie out.

I’ll wait to continue until the excitement dies down.

Okay… The film, entitled “An Inconvenient Truth“, is about… you guess it: global warming. I thought this was already done, what with “The Day After Tomorrow“, but apparently the topic deserved to be re-explored until we’re so scared that we finally decide to do an accurate Florida recount.

For Gore’s first movie, I was hoping for something more along the line of “How I Invented the Internet” or “Love Story II”, but I guess you have to start somewhere. Here’s a clip.

I haven’t seen the film, however. So, here’s a review by Richard Cohen of the New York Daily News.

A sample:

You cannot see this film and not think of George W. Bush, the man who beat Gore in 2000. Bush has been studiously anti-science, a man of applied ignorance who has undernourished his mind with the empty calories of comfy dogma. For instance, his insistence on abstinence as the preferred method of birth control would be laughable were it not so reckless. It is similar to Bush’s initial approach to global warming. It may be that Gore will do more good for his country and the world with this movie than Bush ever did by winning in 2000.

So, Gore’s movie is about… what? Promoting abstinence is stupid? If only Richard Cohen’s parents were abstinent… perchance to dream…

The link between abstinence and global warming is real, you know. If you think about it, abstinence does contribute to global warming. If people aren’t screwing, they’re driving, using hairspray, or burning leaves. So it’s either overpopulation, or global warming. Either way we’re killing ourselves.

Al! Help!

Anyway, at least the global warming bunch showed some business acumen in the release date of the film. Usually a liberal, utilizing the skills acquired acheiving a Master’s Degree in tarantula dentistry, would put out a movie on global warming in the middle of the winter, but Al is learning. Gore went for a release date when it would already be hot outside, and all of us sweaty movie-goers would be sitting in a theater that will probably have it’s air-conditioning turned off as we burn up in the pleather seats, and think “damn, Al’s on to something!”

But here’s the real beauty of the global warming theory. If Gore is ever giving a speech in a climate that is cold, they’ve got that covered as well.

Bill Clinton tried it in a speech not long ago in Montreal. Clinton pointed to evidence of global warming, including that glaciers in the Himalayas, and Arctic sea ice, are melting and the warm Atlantic currents are slowing down.

One result of a slowing Gulf Stream would be, for several reasons, more severe winters and cooler summers in Europe. As Bill might say, “It depends on what your definition of ‘warming’ is.”

The global-warming theory is brilliant in its conception, because even cooling to the point of another ice age is proof of the warming. The only area of the argument left uncovered is the part where the hand sticks out to collect the money.

There are, however, many people who debunk human-induced “global warming” as sheer Mr. Haney snake-oil, such as “JunkScience.com“, which voted global warming one of the top ten junk science stories of the past decade.

Frankly, the only hard evidence I’ve seen of human-induced global warming is that Gore seems to be sweating more.

Man-made global warming is a fact? Sorry, Al, but I demand a recount.


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Author: Doug Powers

Doug Powers is a writer, editor and commentator covering news of the day from a conservative viewpoint with an occasional shot of irreverence and a chaser of snark. Townhall Media writer/editor. MichelleMalkin.com alum. Bowling novice. Long-suffering Detroit Lions fan. Contact: WriteDoug@Live.com.