Need some money? Forget about refinancing the house or selling Mary Kay, the real cash to be made in the next few months is in mobilizing people, who wouldn’t have otherwise voted, to go to the polls. Make their ignorance your bliss.

There’s gold in them thar Democrats!

If you’re in Alabama, Arkansas, Colorado, Iowa, Maryland, Michigan, Minnesota, Montana, North Carolina, Oregon, Tennessee and Washington, this could be your key to success (if your state isn’t on the list, rest easy, it’ll get there).

Here’s a brief explanation:

Several deep-pocketed Democratic donors, frustrated with party chairman Howard Dean effort to attract young voters, are offering up to $3 million in grants to organizations that could persuade those age 18-24 to vote Democratic.

“The party’s plans to reach out to young people are incredibly insufficient,” said Deborah Rappaport of Redwood, Calif., one of the donors. “If we don’t pay attention to them now, we will lose them.”

Rappaport planned to announce the plan to award grants on Friday at a convention of liberal activists in Las Vegas. The donors plan to award up to a dozen grants over the next three years that could total $250,000 each to groups or individuals in 12 states.

The admitted failure of Rock the Vote, Rock against Bush, and many others, has apparently caused some frustrated Democrats to take the next logical step: a commission based voter recruitment program. Dare we call this a plan to play on peoples’ greed? We would if they were Republicans, but since they’re Democrats, it’s not greed, it’s “good deed induced corollary financial acquisitiveness.”

This has always gone on in some form or another, but it’s never been advertised as such. It’s nice to see some big Democrat leaders and donors have a bout with honesty.

So, if you need cash, and now, then saddle up and get out there to recruit people 18-24 to vote Democrat and you just may catch the eye of Rappaport and Lewis.

After all, what makes our system of government great is that we can throw around money to try to get people to the polls. The money is used to find people who had no intention of casting a ballot in the first place, get them to a voting machine they may or may not be able to figure out how to use, to vote for candidates they’ve never heard of for reasons they would never have cared about if somebody wasn’t being paid a commission to point them in the left direction.

I’ve never been a Democrat because, from an early age, I noticed that it’s the Democrats who seem to have the most interest in coaxing the ignorant, lazy and uninformed into going to the polls. In nature, these are victims of the “survival of the fittest” realities of life, but in politics, the entire herd is made to slow down because of the lollygaggers and doofy who either can’t or won’t keep up. When that happens in nature, the entire herd is devoured (which is why that never happens in nature). When that happens in politics, the same thing happens, just very slowly, and very expensively, both in terms of your rights and assets.

So, if you want to be a part of the what could be a lucrative Democrat herd, and need cash badly, go to the video game stores and summer concerts to recruit Democrat voters. Your grant awaits!


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