Third Parties Face a Radical Choice: Infiltration, or Extinction

Well, it’s almost that time of year once again when we choose between the candidate who supports taking what we’ve got and financing the rest to our kids – and their kids – and their kids; and the one who wants to do the same thing, but a little slower.

In almost all races, either a Republican or a Democrat will win. Sure, third parties will be on the ticket, but like a Snickers bar in Michael Moore’s car, they are certain to be gone by the time we reach our destination — which is, in this case, the day after the election. There is no end in sight to the plight of the third party, which is why a drastic measure is in order.

Third parties – be they Libertarian, Constitution, Green, Socialist, Communist, Workers, America First, or any others – can’t and won’t make big gains nationally. Why? For the same reason that a dog can be surrounded by Alpo and yet starve to death – an inability to open the can.

Because a good number of socialists and others to the left have already infiltrated the ranks of the Democrats and even the Republicans, for now we’ll keep the focus on those third parties with philosophies closer to my own – parties like the Constitution and Libertarian, both of which promote smaller government, limited taxation and generally like to keep nosiness and government-sponsored pickpocketing to a minimum.

Since it’s difficult to design a political system for people who loathe political systems, being a small-government third party is tougher to manage than most other political philosophies. Like a group called “Humans Against Heartbeats,” the very act of existing tends to contradict its cause.

Obviously, it takes big bucks to run for political office. Huge and often obscene amounts of money are poured into the political coffers – so much so that when a candidate leaves a fund-raiser, it looks as if they’re smuggling out the dinner salad in their suit coat pockets. There’s a reason for that: It takes money to be competitive in the system as it exists, and no amount of fantasy about the Founders intentions can change that now.

The best and quickest way for third-party candidates to get in a position to obtain a high elected office in our current system would be to collectively climb inside a “Trojan Horse” of sorts and infiltrate the Republican Party. Why not the Democrats? Because we wouldn’t want to make it too obvious. Among the pool of Democrats, a limited taxation, pro capitalist, anti-big-government candidate would stick out like Mahmoud Ahmadinejad at a Bar Mitzvah, and the gig would be up.

This can all be done without compromising or lying about core beliefs. Just because the candidates are going to be politicians is no reason to become a politician. It’s only a name. As they say, you can’t get wet just by saying “water.”

If third parties stick to continued refusal to infiltrate the current system in the existing vehicles, they’ll be forever sitting on an airport runway, refusing to get on a 747 because they’re convinced they can build their own out of some two-by-fours, glue, mason blocks and the motor from a weedwacker.

It’s time for third parties to get serious.

Look at the Libertarians. The highest-profile current candidate in the party right now is Alabama’s Loretta Nall, who is running for governor and campaigning on her cleavage. Not bad, but this probably won’t do the trick. A campaign with slogans that I can only speculate will be along the line of “Turn the udder cheek,” “Trick or teat,” and “Thanks for the mammaries,” will get national attention, but not in a desirable way for a political party that hopes to be competitive.

Texas Congressman Ron Paul has done it the proper way. Paul is a Libertarian (and the presidential candidate for that party in 1988), but has since been elected and serves as a Republican. If the more conservative third parties could manage to sneak in several more Ron Paul types as Republicans, then they could split off into a third party with a ready built and solid footing in Washington.

The Constitution and Libertarian Parties, having a firm grip on economics, believe in free markets, and as such should be familiar with the important concept of “critical mass.”

Third-party refusal to collectively stow away on the S.S. Status Quo and then, once at sea, take over, condemns them forever to a life of 8 p.m. meetings in the back rooms of Applebees restaurants across the country dreaming of what might, but almost certainly never will, come to be. All while the two-party machine continues merrily along on its course of usurping the constitution.

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Lynne Cheney Gives CNN a Smackdown

Dick Cheney’s wife Lynne, appearing with Wolf Blitzer on CNN, stuck honey down CNN’s pants and released the bees.

Commenting on CNN’s decision to be a propaganda puppet for terrorists, Cheney asked, “Do you want us to win?”

“Journalistic integrity,” combined with at least a rudimentary understanding of public relations, suppressed any inclination CNN suits might have had to answer that question honestly, but Wolf did answer it: “Of course we want America to win. We are Americans.” Wolf says that CNN was simply “reporting the news.”

Funny, that’s the same thing that Al Jazeera says.

Lynne then invited Wolf and the gang down to Texas to go hunting with Dick. I hear they declined.

 

My Brush With Psychic John Edward, Tonight on The Glenn Beck Show

As many of you know, I write for Glenn Beck’s magazine, Fusion. Glenn has a nationally syndicated radio show and also has a terrific TV show on every night (7 e.s.t., repeated at 9 and midnight) on CNN Headline News.

On tonight’s show, Glenn will have psychic John Edward on for the entire hour.

I was always skeptical as far as psychics go, and have always wanted to research and write about them. As luck would have it, a while back my wife and I won a free reading with John Edward, and flew to New York on their dime. It worked out perfectly, because shortly after that we joined Glenn in Manhattan on his radio show to discuss the day we were, as you might say, “at large with a medium.”

That was in late August. Fast forward the tape to today … I just got off the phone with Kevin, the producer of the TV show, and Glenn will talk briefly about our experience on tonight’s broadcast toward the end of the hour, in the “skeptics” section.

I’m writing more about it and will post the whole experience here on the blog at some point in the future.

Cutting Off Our Stem Cells To Spite Our Faces

There’s not much more that can be said specifically about the Michael J. Fox anti Jim Talent stem-cell ad and subsequent Rush Limbaugh commentary on same, other than that I think we’re totally bogged down in a complete missing of the point.

Some are accusing Fox of being used by the Dems, but Fox insists he’s bipartisan, and when asked by Katie Couric if he’d ever supported a Republican, Fox said he supported Arlen Specter. So the short answer to Couric’s question is “no.”

Through all the somewhat meaningless ancillary carping, some questions have arisen that need to be addressed to the pro stem cell research people, and the rest of us for that matter.

First, politics. Can somebody please tell me any major disease that was ultimately cured because voters in the U.S. chose one particular politician over another? Of course, politicians make those claims all the time. Remember when John Edwards said that if John Kerry were elected, people like Christopher Reeves would walk again? Boy, those bumper stickers are correct — Jesus was, indeed, a liberal. Not only that but He had a place on Nantucket and could just walk there from the mainland.

Consider a scenario similar to the one we’re witnessing now in Missouri, except in a different time and place. Actress Mia Farrow had polio as a child. Had Farrow done radio ads from her iron lung in the late 40’s supporting one political candidate over another, would this have had any bearing whatsoever on Jonas Salk’s development of the first successful polio vaccine?

Among all the diseases in the history of mankind that have been cured, there is one single common denominator among all of them — human beings discovered the cures. But there’s the real catch. Jonas Salk wasn’t initially able to develop a vaccine because of politics — he was able to develop it because he was, first and foremost, alive.

Embryonic stem cell research, as it’s performed today, involves one ingredient to get started: a dead human being, which has been either aborted or created to serve as a stem cell farm.

What if one of those aborted babies – who was perhaps killed under the guise of somebody’s “right,” further justified by the need for his or her glorious stem cells, in which supposedly lies the cure for neurological diseases – was destined to be the very person to find a cure for Parkinson’s disease? Talk about a “one wheel in the sand” approach to disease eradication.

In other words, the odds are ever increasing that God has sent us the future scientist who would have found a cure for these horrible diseases, but he or she was killed. Why? So we could find a cure for these horrible diseases. Wow.

Michael J. Fox can be certain of one thing: a human being will discover the cure for his disease. Supporting the killing of human beings in order to find a cure for your disease is like a wealthy hemorrhoid sufferer bulldozing a Preparation H factory in order to build “The Institute for the Research of Rectal Itch.”

Political affiliations are meaningless in this argument, with one caveat: I’ll never vote for the Donner Party candidate, whoever that may be.

*****

Addendum: The Michael J. Fox ad now has some competition from the other side. An embryo has endorsed Jim Talent in the Missouri senate race. Here’s a video of the embryo’s controversial ad. Hey, fair is fair.

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Bush Signs Border Fence Bill, Attendance at "Bruce Jenner's Caracas Pole Vault Camp" Skyrockets

From the A.P.:

President Bush signed a bill Thursday authorizing 700 miles of new fencing along the U.S.-Mexico border, hoping to give Republican candidates a pre-election platform for asserting they’re tough on illegal immigration.

“Unfortunately the United States has not been in complete control of its borders for decades and therefore illegal immigration has been on the rise,” Bush said at a signing ceremony.

The bill is bipartisan, which means that once construction is completed, ladders will be distributed to Mexicans and the fence will be named after Senator Robert Byrd.

Bush Signs Border Fence Bill, Attendance at “Bruce Jenner’s Caracas Pole Vault Camp” Skyrockets

From the A.P.:

President Bush signed a bill Thursday authorizing 700 miles of new fencing along the U.S.-Mexico border, hoping to give Republican candidates a pre-election platform for asserting they’re tough on illegal immigration.

“Unfortunately the United States has not been in complete control of its borders for decades and therefore illegal immigration has been on the rise,” Bush said at a signing ceremony.

The bill is bipartisan, which means that once construction is completed, ladders will be distributed to Mexicans and the fence will be named after Senator Robert Byrd.

"Undecided Voter": The Oxymoron That Won't Die

We constantly hear about the much courted “undecided voter,” a term that should be an oxymoron, but unfortunately isn’t. I suppose it sounds better than “uninformed guesser.” This is a group of people who are, as the election rapidly approaches, being bombarded with messages in order to get their last-minute vote. This is a scary thought, and also punishes people who did their homework on time.

It didn’t used to be this way.

Shortly before the Revolutionary War, one-third of the colonists were for independence, one-third were content with the British tax system, warm beer and driving their buggies on the left side of the road, and one-third were neutral or completely indifferent or unaware of what was going on. Naturally, for a nation seeking a logical direction, the wise thing to do would be to base the national course of action on the last second thoughts or whims of that latter third, right?

That’s how we seem to handle it these days. If you don’t have an opinion, we’ll make you have one, and sometimes even drive you to the polls. What a bad way to run an election, not to mention a country.

Fortunately, in the mid to late 1700s, the neutral, ignorant or undecided were left alone to ride along on whatever path was chosen for them, as they deserved. Now, undecideds are rounded up and put in a room to question the candidates, where they play a pivotal role each election year and often end up check-mating the vote of those of us who were silly enough to pay attention in the first place.

In addition, for some reason, the media has attached a label of nobility to this confused bloc of potential voters. Decided voters are often the ones painted as having a kneejerk preconceived notion — nothing at all like the open-minded voter who flips a coin at the polling place or is swayed by fictional or irrelevant claims.

It takes Talent to out-Fox undecided voters

It’s because of these “undecideds” that we’re subjected to insane last-minute commercials featuring lies, deceptions, designed controversy and/or end-arounds that cause us to lose focus on the point.

As an example, consider the Michael J. Fox ad that aired in Missouri during the World Series. The ad was in support of Claire McCaskell against Jim Talent in the race for Missouri senate. Rush Limbaugh came out to criticize the ad, then Fox responded, then the media responded, and now I can’t even remember which candidate was for what. In other words, the ad did exactly what it was designed to do.

So there sat some undecided voters in Missouri, watching the World Series game, who now may have decided which senate candidate to vote for because Michael J. Fox, who lives in New York by the way, would really like to not have Parkinson’s Disease. Hopefully stem-cell research can also find a way to handle national defense and the economy — both of which seem to have become mere side issues in this particular election.

In the case of many Missouri undecideds, there’s a good possibility they’ll be swayed by the Fox ad. Political views aside, when you think about the scope of our problems, is it a good thing for the country that a political candidate – who, if elected, will help decide the direction of the nation in an age of global strife, terrorism, domestic flaps, illegal immigration, and all the rest – could be put into office simply because many Missourians would like nothing more than to see the guy who played Marty McFly in “Back to the Future” movies resume a normal acting career?

There are many more ads, from the silly to the inane, that insult the intelligence of the decided voter to the point where they might not want to vote. You hear frustrated people almost every day say they’re not going to vote because they think it doesn’t matter anyway. Politicians know this, which is why the undecideds are such a large and courted voting bloc.

Someday soon, if it isn’t already, the nation will be completely governed by those elected by the undecided. Maybe it’s worth a shot, because those of us who like to think we know what we’re doing don’t seem to be getting anywhere either.

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Note: If you’re seeing only this post, the entire blog can be accessed at DougPowers.com

“Undecided Voter”: The Oxymoron That Won’t Die

We constantly hear about the much courted “undecided voter,” a term that should be an oxymoron, but unfortunately isn’t. I suppose it sounds better than “uninformed guesser.” This is a group of people who are, as the election rapidly approaches, being bombarded with messages in order to get their last-minute vote. This is a scary thought, and also punishes people who did their homework on time.

It didn’t used to be this way.

Shortly before the Revolutionary War, one-third of the colonists were for independence, one-third were content with the British tax system, warm beer and driving their buggies on the left side of the road, and one-third were neutral or completely indifferent or unaware of what was going on. Naturally, for a nation seeking a logical direction, the wise thing to do would be to base the national course of action on the last second thoughts or whims of that latter third, right?

That’s how we seem to handle it these days. If you don’t have an opinion, we’ll make you have one, and sometimes even drive you to the polls. What a bad way to run an election, not to mention a country.

Fortunately, in the mid to late 1700s, the neutral, ignorant or undecided were left alone to ride along on whatever path was chosen for them, as they deserved. Now, undecideds are rounded up and put in a room to question the candidates, where they play a pivotal role each election year and often end up check-mating the vote of those of us who were silly enough to pay attention in the first place.

In addition, for some reason, the media has attached a label of nobility to this confused bloc of potential voters. Decided voters are often the ones painted as having a kneejerk preconceived notion — nothing at all like the open-minded voter who flips a coin at the polling place or is swayed by fictional or irrelevant claims.

It takes Talent to out-Fox undecided voters

It’s because of these “undecideds” that we’re subjected to insane last-minute commercials featuring lies, deceptions, designed controversy and/or end-arounds that cause us to lose focus on the point.

As an example, consider the Michael J. Fox ad that aired in Missouri during the World Series. The ad was in support of Claire McCaskell against Jim Talent in the race for Missouri senate. Rush Limbaugh came out to criticize the ad, then Fox responded, then the media responded, and now I can’t even remember which candidate was for what. In other words, the ad did exactly what it was designed to do.

So there sat some undecided voters in Missouri, watching the World Series game, who now may have decided which senate candidate to vote for because Michael J. Fox, who lives in New York by the way, would really like to not have Parkinson’s Disease. Hopefully stem-cell research can also find a way to handle national defense and the economy — both of which seem to have become mere side issues in this particular election.

In the case of many Missouri undecideds, there’s a good possibility they’ll be swayed by the Fox ad. Political views aside, when you think about the scope of our problems, is it a good thing for the country that a political candidate – who, if elected, will help decide the direction of the nation in an age of global strife, terrorism, domestic flaps, illegal immigration, and all the rest – could be put into office simply because many Missourians would like nothing more than to see the guy who played Marty McFly in “Back to the Future” movies resume a normal acting career?

There are many more ads, from the silly to the inane, that insult the intelligence of the decided voter to the point where they might not want to vote. You hear frustrated people almost every day say they’re not going to vote because they think it doesn’t matter anyway. Politicians know this, which is why the undecideds are such a large and courted voting bloc.

Someday soon, if it isn’t already, the nation will be completely governed by those elected by the undecided. Maybe it’s worth a shot, because those of us who like to think we know what we’re doing don’t seem to be getting anywhere either.

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Note: If you’re seeing only this post, the entire blog can be accessed at DougPowers.com

Exploding Beer Keg Kills Man — Rest of Crowd Managed to Dodge the Draft

A Connecticut man was killed after some idiot threw a beer keg in a fire.

This story has been circulating the ‘net as a potential “Darwin Award” winner, but that’s not the case. Had the moron who threw the keg in been killed (as God intended but missed), then it would have qualified — but it didn’t happen that way.

Here’s the MySpace page of the unfortunate victim. The world is minus one toe-suck fetishist. Dick Morris, you alone must carry on the legacy!

Gilligan's Laboratory: The Incompetence and Corruption of Los Alamos

Police in New Mexico who were conducting a drug raid at a mobile home discovered more than just drugs — they also found classified information taken from the Los Alamos National Laboratory. Hey, how did those get out of Sandy Burger’s pants?

Here’s a bit more explanation:

Police alerted the FBI to the secret documents, which agents traced back to a woman linked to the drug dealer, officials said. The woman is a contract employee at Los Alamos National Laboratory, according to an FBI official who spoke on condition of anonymity because of the sensitive nature of the case.

The official would not describe the documents except to say that they appeared to contain classified material and were stored on a computer file.

This certainly isn’t the first time there have been problems at the lab. There’s a good reason their nickname is Lost Alamos.

Here’s a good description of what the Los Alamos lab does — or tries to do:

Los Alamos National Laboratory (LANL) is a facility managed and funded by the United States Department of Energy and operated by the University of California. LANL is responsible for the research, design, development and safe stewardship for approximately 85% of the U.S. nuclear arsenal. LANL is located within the State and District of New Mexico.

Safe stewardship? The people who write these things really need to learn that you need to insert a break after a laugh-line.

The place used to be called the Los Alamos Nuclear Laboratory until one incompetent blunder after another was causing people to be a bit nervous, so they must have figured that removing “nuclear” and replacing it with “national” was easier than fixing the reasons their security was easier to crack than a Ming vase on the San Andreas Fault.

Part of the problem these days is that treason and espionage don’t seem to be too big a deal. Heck, Lynne Stewart, leftist lawyer and a willing participant in an Islamic terror plot against the U.S., just recently was sentenced to a couple of years in jail. Enron’s Jeffrey Skilling, on the other hand, is going away for 24 years. The lesson is clear: if we really want to thwart terrorism, we first need to get terrorists CEO gigs at large corporations – and then hope they suck at accounting.

It’s kind of scary if you think about it. A U.S. nuclear laboratory is operated by the University of California. I repeat: A college in California operates a U.S. nuclear laboratory. I wouldn’t trust the average U.S. university with my car for the day, let alone nuke secrets. You just know that somewhere there’s a kid with a beer bong he fashioned out of the manual cover for the Manhattan Project.

By the way, this Friday is “High tech Halloween night” at Los Alamos. Come dressed as your favorite perpetrator of espionage or incompetent security. I’ve got a great Wen Ho Lee mask if anybody wants it.

Los Alamos security learns of the discovery of stolen classified information via the radio

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