Dr. StrangeGore, Or: How I Learned To Stop Worrying and Love Global Warming

Word is that the University of Minnesota may give an honorary doctorate degree in climatology to Al Gore. The school will present Gore with a degree for his work on global warming after they give Mike Nifong his honorary doctorate in criminal justice.

Gore’s starting to get honorary doctorates for theories that are guesses at best (outright money grabs at worst), and he’s making money on films which allows him to travel by private jet and eloquently maintain his three large homes. Al’s even gone into the concert promoting biz, and is up for an Academy Award. Life is good.

I wonder if the degree ceremony for Gore’s work on global warming will end up being cancelled due to an ice and snowstorm, like this global warming conference was.

As for Gore’s doctorate, I wrote the following in a column for The American Spectator last April, and it pretty much sums up why I’m baffled at the fawning over Gore and his cloudy crystal ball:

Gore-style meteorology, specifically climatology as it concerns global warming, seems to be one of those rare sciences for which the percentage of accuracy of predictions rises as the distance from the date in question increases.

To buy into this scientific convenience takes the same blind confidence required to believe an archer who tells you he can put an arrow through a soda can at 500 yards — the same person who you’ve noticed can’t hit a bale of hay from 10 feet away.

Ask the night sweat-suffering Gore what the world will look like in 100 years if the United States doesn’t sign on to the Kyoto Protocol, and you’ll be drawn a gloomy, and very specific, picture of our final days. Then ask him what the overnight low will be in Chattanooga two weeks from Thursday, and you’ll get an unresponsive stare. At some point during the conversation, Gore will excuse himself and go burn thousands of gallons of jet fuel to fly to an emergency summit meeting on ozone depletion.

As a side note, I find it fascinating that the climate somehow seems to know who the president is. When Al was veep for eight years, we didn’t hear a whisper about any of this. Then Bush gets in, and the ice caps start melting like a banana split in a sauna and hurricanes ravage the land. If Hillary wins, we’re all saved again.

Even the damned weather is partisan these days.


“I’d like to thank all my Hollywood friends who are here tonight to show solidarity in combatting global warming. Those of you who got in your three-mile-per-gallon limos and headed for the red carpet, many of you after arriving in your private jets, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Without you, none of this would have been possible.”

Author: Doug Powers

Doug Powers is a writer, editor and commentator covering news of the day from a conservative viewpoint with an occasional shot of irreverence and a chaser of snark. Townhall Media writer/editor. MichelleMalkin.com alum. Bowling novice. Long-suffering Detroit Lions fan. Contact: WriteDoug@Live.com.