How To Unnecessarily and Heartlessly Ruin Alec Baldwin's Good Deed

As the Gilligan of Hollywood Island, Alec Baldwin is my favorite liberal actor. I tend to pick on him and make fun, but this was a nice thing to do:

After reading a Mar. 4 article in the New York Times about an 18-year-old female Army soldier preparing to embark on her first tour in Iraq, the 30 Rock star was so touched he decided to reach out and offer to help pay for her college education.

The Times article chronicled Pvt. Resha Kane’s emotional farewell with family and friends as she left behind her innocent teen years for the grueling military life she was about to encounter upon shipping out for training at Fort Hood, Texas.

According to Baldwin’s spokesman, Matthew Hiltzik, the story and accompanying photo of the soldier tugged at the thesp’s heartstrings because Resha reminded him of his 11-year-old daughter, Ireland, and he was so affected he wanted to lend a hand.

So, once in a while, I need to cut Baldwin some slack — but not today.

I’ll offer to sponsor Resha Kane and her friends’ first kegger if she uses Baldwin’s money to go to a conservative college, such as Hillsdale. Alec’s head would a-splode!

How To Unnecessarily and Heartlessly Ruin Alec Baldwin’s Good Deed

As the Gilligan of Hollywood Island, Alec Baldwin is my favorite liberal actor. I tend to pick on him and make fun, but this was a nice thing to do:

After reading a Mar. 4 article in the New York Times about an 18-year-old female Army soldier preparing to embark on her first tour in Iraq, the 30 Rock star was so touched he decided to reach out and offer to help pay for her college education.

The Times article chronicled Pvt. Resha Kane’s emotional farewell with family and friends as she left behind her innocent teen years for the grueling military life she was about to encounter upon shipping out for training at Fort Hood, Texas.

According to Baldwin’s spokesman, Matthew Hiltzik, the story and accompanying photo of the soldier tugged at the thesp’s heartstrings because Resha reminded him of his 11-year-old daughter, Ireland, and he was so affected he wanted to lend a hand.

So, once in a while, I need to cut Baldwin some slack — but not today.

I’ll offer to sponsor Resha Kane and her friends’ first kegger if she uses Baldwin’s money to go to a conservative college, such as Hillsdale. Alec’s head would a-splode!

Objects in the Universe: A Study of Magnitude

It’s the weekend, so I’m going to avoid politics for the time being in order to relax. I thought instead it would be interesting to include a bit of fascinating science.

Just how big are objects in our universe? It’s difficult to grasp the enormity sometimes, but there’s an interesting series of pictures at this blog that I’ll re-post here, adding a couple that were overlooked by the original author.

If these pictures don’t make us feel small, nothing will:

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Amazing. Simply amazing.

What Would Margaret and Ron Do?

nullIt’s difficult to watch the reaction of British and American politicians to the events surrounding the 15 captured British sailors and marines without wondering how Margaret Thatcher and Ronald Reagan would have responded.

We can be virtually assured that the Dynamic Duo of the 80’s would have, at the very least, reacted differently than Blair and Bush, as Thatcher and Reagan realized the inherent danger in saying “please” when you don’t have to. True, the chances are somewhat good that Mahmoud Ahmadinejad would have gotten a missile between the eyes by now, but the chances are greater that and the 15 would have never been taken hostage in the first place. Such is the luxury of the reputation as a quick and overwhelming responder.

But this is a new day. We now live in the age of ill advised appeasement and stalled negotiation, and both practices always favor the despot du jour.

Iran claims to have satellite evidence, provided with the assistance of the renowned Iranian Space Program no doubt (their moon landing is depicted in the gripping film “The Shiite has landed”), that the 15 were in Iranian territory when they were taken prisoner. England says “no they weren’t” and Iran says “yes they were” and England says “no they weren’t” and… you get the point. This is another verbal tickle-fight that Reagan and Thatcher wouldn’t have wasted their time on, as they were well aware that totalitarian regimes are unlikely to be swayed by either the existence of facts, or the lack of them.

In the meantime, Iran continues with the mind games and to demand that Britain admit the captured members of the military were trespassing or else they’ll be put on trial. The prisoners are also being paraded for the camera and forced to make statements demanding the U.K. and U.S. pull out of Iraq immediately, as Iran can’t cull an effective terrorist garden without access to that fertile ground.

Tony Blair is described as “livid.” As soon as he reaches “bloody pissed” Iran is in danger of… of — a violent apology.

From the Times Online:

Iran twisted the knife in the hostage crisis last night, releasing a letter said to be from the captured servicewoman Faye Turney in which she called for British troops to be withdrawn from Iraq.

The letter, in which Tehran appeared to be using the hostages to try to dictate British foreign policy, was apparently designed to heap humiliation on Tony Blair.

The United Nations is, of course, drafting the obligatory “strongly worded” statement. This will be sent to Iran’s leaders along with an FTD “appease-me-up” bouquet just as soon as the U.N. Committee on Round-Table Panels of Task Forces for Floral Arrangements decides what kind of flowers to enclose and whether or not to use the words “demand the release” or “beg your indulgence.”

What would Margaret and Ron do? Not any of this.

Marines Ban Tattoos?

The libification of the country and our ban-happy culture is now infiltrating the ranks of those who have spent literally hundreds of years keeping us free of libifiers and ban-happy despots — the U.S. Marines.

From the A.P.:

Five tattooed skulls stretch from Marine Cpl. Jeremy Slaton’s right elbow to his wrist, spelling out the word “Death.” He planned to add a tattoo spelling “Life” on his left arm, but that’s on hold because of a Marine policy taking effect Sunday.

The Marines are banning any new, extra-large tattoos below the elbow or the knee, saying such body art is harmful to the Corps’ spit-and-polish image.

Slaton and other grunts are not pleased.

It can’t be long until the Marines have all their guns taken away, as those things are just, well, unsightly.

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It is the ultimate goal of the American left for the U.S. Marines to embrace the “unarmed and fabulous” role model presented by the French army, above

When Charitable Giving is Greedy: The Catch-22 of Being Wal-Mart

Wal-Mart, the company that gives so many labor unions and “workers rights” folks stress-induced acne, anger hives and the runs, is tops among companies when it comes to charitable giving.

The company gave away $272 million last year, making it the largest corporate donor of charitable cash, but yet remains one of the biggest targets for the liberal preoccupation of attempting to control things they don’t build, own, invest in, work at, or understand.

In 2005 an article appeared in The Nation, the magazine that leans so far left it needs scaffold support so it doesn’t fall down upon the offshoot Lilliputian liberals cooling in its shadow, which questioned the motives behind Wal-Mart’s charitable giving — including $20 million for Hurricane Katrina relief.

The “findings” can be essentially summed up in two ways: 1) Wal-Mart is only giving all that money away to cure some image problems, and 2) Way too much of it is going to Republicans. The article cites the fact that Alice Walton gave $2.6 million to the Republican PAC “Progress for America” (the left hates it when anybody else co-opts the word “progress”). Progress for America “supported the sleazy Swift Boat Veterans for Truth.”

Some Walton money went toward the defeat of John Kerry? Oh the horror! America finally had a chance to put somebody who understands what it means to be in a “working family” into the Oval Office, but a wave of the Wal-Mart wand helped send blue-collar Thurston back to cocktails on the Vineyard with Lovie. Sometimes there is no justice.

If the Walton family were raging leftists, what are the odds any of this would be an issue? Heck, if Sam Walton was a raging leftist, what are the odds that Wal-Mart would even exist? Sam may well have ended up being just another lamprey on somebody else’s financial shark.

Sometimes Wal-Mart attempts to appease in varied ways, but it never works and their critics only get more vocal and demanding.

Now we sit back and await the liberal response to the most recent Wal-Mart charitable report, and we’ll soon know how much of a raise that amount of money would have given each employee, and how much of that should have gone to leeches who had nothing to do with, nor understanding of, what it takes to create that amount of wealth in the first place.

A major complaint from Wal-Mart critics is that, since the death of Sam Walton, the company fell into the hands of his children, who of course are “out of touch” with working class America and who have used much of the money they inherited to prop up political causes.

So, who’s the lead figure when it comes to opposing the people who inherited all their money from their father, like to play partisan politics and don’t know what it’s like to work for a living? Ted Kennedy. I know. Go ahead and laugh. It’s okay.

Here’s what I predict will be Ted Kennedy’s response/rebuttal to the news of Wal-Mart’s enormous charitable offerings in 2006: “It’s so easy to be able to give away such large sums of money when you’re not paying your employees fair wages or offering adequate health care.”

If it’s so bad working at Wal-Mart, I’d suggest heeding the sage advice of the comedian Larry the Cable Guy: “Then don’t work at friggin’ Wal-Mart.” Apparently it’s not that easy.

Another San Fran Ban

The San Francisco City Council has voted to ban plastic grocery bags.

Here’s a quick suggestion for the companies that make those now banned bags: Start calling them “grocery condoms” and not only will the S.F. Council approve, they’ll be handing them out in every school in the city.

“Practice safe grocery shopping. This message brought to you by the San Francisco City Council, The National Plastic Grocery Bag Association, Thorazine, and this station.”

Lego: The Preferred Toy of Evil Capitalists

Not long ago I started reading an article about a school that banned Legos. At first I thought it might be because they were discovered to contain trans-fats or emit second-hand smoke, but the reason was a little more Marxist than that.

My kids play with Legos on a fairly consistent basis, but little did I realize that the little interlocking colorful hunks of building plastic are actually teaching children about the evils of private property ownership. Cool!

So after I went out and purchased a few more tubs of the greedy capitalist-creating blocks — tools of the “vast right wing conspiracy” no doubt (this has Halliburton’s fingerprints all over it) — I went back and finished the article:

A ban was initiated at the Hilltop Children’s Center in Seattle. According to an article in the winter 2006-07 issue of “Rethinking Schools” magazine, the teachers at the private school wanted their students to learn that private property ownership is evil.

According to the article, the students had been building an elaborate “Legotown,” but it was accidentally demolished. The teachers decided its destruction was an opportunity to explore “the inequities of private ownership.” According to the teachers, “Our intention was to promote a contrasting set of values: collectivity, collaboration, resource-sharing, and full democratic participation.”

Not to mention the demolished Legotown was the perfect chance to show the kids what a city run by socialists and communists ends up looking like.

But, alas, after months of indoctrination by the feel-good Gestapo, the evil toys were allowed back in the presence of the students, with some caveats:

Legos returned to the classroom after the children agreed to several guiding principles framed by the teachers, including that “All structures are public structures” and “All structures will be standard sizes.” The teachers quote the children:

“A house is good because it is a community house.”

“We should have equal houses. They should be standard sizes.”

“It’s important to have the same amount of power as other people over your building.”

“Equal”? “The same”? “Standard”? Aren’t these the same types of bilge-tanks on the SS Chomsky who constantly harp on about “we’re like snowflakes, we’re all different” while Peter, Paul & Mary plays on a potato-powered radio in their Prius? If they are, it ends there.

The architects of “equal power” movements always make sure of one thing: Their amount of power is way more equal than yours — and if you don’t believe me, try getting this school to meet you halfway on changing its curriculum.

As AL Gore’s copy of the liberal dictionary teaches us, “we” is always defined as “you, not me.”

I’m off now to help my kids build a Lego unemployment office, a privately owned building of course, where we’ll pretend that “educators” such as these are standing in a Lego unemployment line until the second coming of Lego Lenin.

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By banning everything personally threatening to the environment, social welfare and teachers unions, educators are better able to teach students what makes this country great: freedom

McCain-Feingold: Five Years of Failure

As I’ve written in the past, I’m no fan of the McCain-Feingold laws, as I tend to disdain counterproductive bureaucratic boneheaded policy.

Ryan Sager has a good piece in today’s NY Sun called “Five years of failure” and he pretty much shares the sentiment, along with nailing the real reason McCain-Feingold exists. There’s also a little food for thought in there for those of us who might be thinking about jumping on the Fred Thompson bandwagon.

Rosie O'Pennafonte: Hollywood Morphing Into One Gigantic Idiot

It’s a confession that must be made: I’ll be happy when President Bush’s term is over and there’s a new person for the left to hate.

As a writer and a keen observer of whiffle-brained Tinseltown activists, it’s getting too confusing keeping track of who said what about Bush.

The empty ideals, full wallets and stuffed egos of Hollywood have been out in force in the past few years, but the wheels are really starting to come off, and it’s tough to break your fall while in a straight-jacket.

Rosie O’Donnell, Sean Penn and Harry Belafonte are three of the most vocal of late in facing down a global political problem that, if it isn’t gotten rid of, could mean the end of their way of life, and perhaps even the world as we know it.

The three entertainers — a rugged looking gruff fella, a Calypso singer, and Sean Penn — are putting all their attention and any spare resources not already dedicated to the upkeep of 10,000 square foot estates toward — once and for all — eradicating the world of its most frightening menace.

Kim Jong-Il? Nope.

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad? Nuh-uh.

Al-Qaida? Nah.

No, O’Donnell and Penn are focusing on the real enemy. The man who makes the hands of Hollywood shake in anger to the point where it creates surf-able Doppler waves in their Evian. The man who is single-handedly stripping away all freedoms in this land — except, apparently, the freedom to make lousy movies, annoying television shows, and over-the-top lunacy-laced commentary with zero sense of historical scope. That enemy is, of course, George W. Bush.

Here’s what Sean Penn said at a San Francisco rally a couple of days ago:

“We cower as you point your fingers telling us to support our troops. You and the smarmy pundits in your pocket — those who bathe in the moisture of your soiled and blood-soaked underwear — can take that noise and shove it.”

The drama lessons really paid off, Sean. Or was that Rosie who said that? I think it was Sean.

Penn then went on to say that he supports the troops, just as long as the money that funds their missions instead goes to Africa and the troops are out of business and working at Taco Bell.

Speaking on The View, the program that gives employment to so many mentally challenged people that it probably qualifies for some sort of Federal subsidy, O’Donnell said that she wonders if the British soldiers who were taken into custody by Iran is a fake incident that Bush invented to provoke a war with Iran.

This may very well be another Gulf of Tonkin-type incident, according to Rosie, though it seems that, even though Hollywood thinks Bush is stupid, he’d at least be smart enough to have the fake abductees be American soldiers. Nice try, Rosie — Or was that said by Harry Belafonte? I can’t remember exactly which.

But Bush is not only an evil man who makes Hitler look like Ward Cleaver, he also keeps slaves in his administration.

In a recent British interview (audio here), Belafonte explained why he thinks blacks in the Bush administration are “house slaves” and “powerless,” why he doesn’t believe Bush is the “greatest terrorist in the world” because Belafonte has yet to meet all the terrorists, and why black conservatives are greedy tools of white people who “will sell you out in a minute” and “have no regard for humanity.”

Condi Rice, Colin Powell, along with Clarence Thomas and many others, have only achieved some of the nation’s highest offices and met with the world’s most powerful people. Black conservatives have yet to defiantly break the stereotypical mold like Belafonte did by singin’ and dancin’ for crowds of mostly white people.

Tell it like it is, Harry! Or was it Penn who said that? Or Rosie? Whatever — until Bush is out of office, I’ll just call them Rosie O’Pennefonte.