You can rest easy tonight, because Sean Penn has engaged in high-level talks with his hero, Hugo Chavez, and there hasn’t been a more intellectually productive actor/communist meeting since the time Jerry Lewis ran into Nikiti Khrushchev:

Chavez said he and Penn discussed the question of “why the (U.S.) empire attacks Chavez so much,” saying Venezuela’s oil wealth is a key reason.

He also said Washington is “afraid that the people of the United States will learn the real truth” about the situation in Venezuela, citing his social programs for the poor.

“If the people of the United States, those millions and millions of poor people … if that nation realizes what is truly happening here, there would be a revolution in the United States,” Chavez said, eliciting applause from Penn.

This is why Sean’s going to do his part by giving his next multi-million dollar movie role to an struggling actor with no money.

But not all actors are idiots:

Some Chavez opponents were angered by Penn’s visit.

Cuban-born actress Maria Conchita Alonso, who grew up in Venezuela, said Penn is lending support to a “totalitarian” leader who wants increasing control of society — a charge Chavez denies.

In a phone interview from her home in Beverly Hills, Calif., Alonso said although she respects Penn as an actor, she hopes he “comes to his senses and he realizes that he’s being used.”

He won’t, because I don’t think he can.

Warning: The Surgeon General has determined that smoking has been found to cause idiocy in laboratory test mice and Hollywood actors.


“I loved ju in ‘Married With Children.’ Dat show cracked me up!”


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