Carbon Footprint Calculator: How You Can Cut Down Your Consumption So Gore’s Not a Hypocrite

The “Global Footprint Network” has a “carbon footprint calculator.”

Click here to find out how big of an environmental nightmare you are. It looks like the ultimate goal of this thing is to point out that the world would be so much better off if everybody except Al Gore and the people from the Global Footprint Network would kill themselves.

I took the quiz and found out that — I should kill myself. According to the seven 20-year-olds who designed this software, it would take 5.6 earths to provide enough resources if everybody lived the way I do. I’m a beer fart away from needing six planets.

Also, it takes over 22 acres worth of earth’s productive area to support the way I live — which means I only need to buy a few more acres and I’ll have myself covered (I’ll do anything to help save the environment from the likes of people like me).

I’m constantly amused by the insinuation, as it’s done here, that if we have no electricity, no running water, no car, little food, no big house, don’t fly and don’t eat meat, that our positive environmental rating goes through the roof. Many of the people that push this nonesense are the same ones who always say we need to “save Africa!” From what? According to the Global Footprint Network, Africa’s environmental stewardship is second to none.

Incidentally, I went back through the quiz and entered the data, pretending to be Al Gore — using information that’s been reported on Al’s hypocrisy and taking guesses as to his eating habits (“vegetarian” certainly doesn’t appear to apply).

This doesn’t even take into account Gore’s motorcades (multiple cars) and multiple homes — based only upon Gore’s electricity usage, my guesses on how many miles he travels by and and car and the size of his primary residence, it would take 8.2 planets to provide enough resources if everybody lived like Al Gore.

But that’s the whole point… everybody should simplify their lives until Al Gore can keep doing what he’s doing and that number of planets is down to “1.” In other words, Gore’s going to keep trying to get you to go back to living in the stone age until he’s not a hypocrite. Good luck with that, Al.