Just Because You Don’t See Shrimp on a Treadmill Nearly Enough These Days…

News flash: Healthy shrimp perform better on a treadmill than diseased shrimp.

Wait. Shrimp on a treadmill? Uh huh:

People actually get paid to think of these things. I went into the wrong line of work.

What they’re not showing you in the video is what’s just outside the tank that makes the shrimp run so fast, and it’s kind of cruel if you ask me. Somebody get PETA on the phone:

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The treadmill trained shrimp will now head to Monaco to take on Usain Bolt in the 200m dash at the IAAF World Athletics Gala this weekend.

Author: Doug Powers

Doug Powers is a writer, editor and commentator covering news of the day from a conservative viewpoint with an occasional shot of irreverence and a chaser of snark. Townhall Media writer/editor. MichelleMalkin.com alum. Bowling novice. Long-suffering Detroit Lions fan. Contact: WriteDoug@Live.com.