Monthly Archives: January 2009

The Audacity of Dope: Obama’s Brother Arrested for Drug Posession

I’m still trying to decide if Barack Obama’s half brother is a black Billy Carter, or a Kenyan Roger Clinton… maybe a little of both. In any case, this guy’s going to be some kind of fun in coming years, and maybe even a little bit of a headache for The One:

NAIROBI (AFP) — US President Barack Obama’s Kenyan half brother George was arrested on charges of possession of cannabis, police sources said Saturday.

George Obama was arrested on Friday with cannabis, known locally as bhang, and was placed in custody, a senior police officer told AFP on condition of anonymity.

I’ve taken the liberty of making a Barack-style campaign poster for George Obama, should he ever consider running for office in Kenya — or even in the U.S., where he’d probably have a better chance of being elected:


Daschle Reinforces Liberal Definition of ‘Oversight’

Tom Daschle has shirked his “patriotic duty” as Joe Biden defines it.

That’s right, yet another hypocrite who wants you and me to pay as much in taxes as possible and will see to it that we rot in prison if we don’t has been caught dodging his own tax responsibilities:

Former Senate Democratic Leader Tom Daschle paid $140,000 in back taxes and interest in recent weeks – much of it due to a car and driver loaned to him for free by a friend and Democratic fundraiser.
Daschle used the Cadillac and driver around Washington while working as a consultant to a New York City private equity firm, InterMedia Advisors. He used the limo 80 percent for personal use – resulting in unreported income of more than $255,000 for the three years, Senate Finance Committee documents show.

Daschle should have purchased Tim Geithner’s “TimboTax” and he’d have gotten through this mess cleanly — maybe he still will.

How long will it be until we hear the “oversight” excuse from Daschle? Put me down for three minutes.

By the way, here’s the definition of “Oversight” in the liberal dictionary:

Oversight: [oh-ver-sahyt] –noun, liberal 1. an excusable omission or error on tax forms due to distraction caused by tireless attempts to help as many children, poor and minorities as possible.

Ed and Elaine Brown should have been wealthy, pro high taxes liberals, and they’d be in cabinet positions in the Obama administration instead of in prison.

Bush Derangement Syndrome, Post Presidency Edition: Top 10 Reactions to Crowd Cheering

Bush is out of office, but the Derangement Syndrome lives on.

Former President Bush and his wife were recently wildly cheered at a basketball game they attended in Texas. Wait — Bush. Cheered? What gives? That can’t happen, can it?

Bush also appeared to tear up during the National Anthem.

Some lefties were befuddled at the crowd reaction, but not for long. Readers at the Huffington Post soon came up with their own theories.

My personal favorites are all those who say that “Respect is earned and Bush never earned mine” who nonetheless find themselves sitting in a wet spot at the mere mention of the empty word “hope.”

So, without further adieu, here are the top ten HuffPo reactions to Bush’s warm reception:

10. Texas deserves this cretin.

9. Wish I was there so I could spill my beer on him. He let people believe a lie and still does. This is how scoundrels are received?

8. I’d be crying too if I screwed up the country as much as he did.

7. Texans = DELUSIONAL

6. I guess the almost complete destruction of America warms the black piece of solid waste in the middle of his chest – that space where a humans heart is. And the hood wearing religious freaks there love him.

5. No tears for the many men, women and children he sent to their early deaths. But he cries over the National Anthem. What a patriot!

4. One day President Bush will be vindicated. The day will surely come. By then, you guys will see that Barack Obama was all talk . . . because HOPE is not a policy, it’s just a feeling. (wait, how did this one get in there?)

3. Every day this traitorious mass murder is allowed to remain a free man mocks our system of justice and calls to question our fitness to be call a civilized society.

2. Let’s get this guy in an open motorcade driving slowly through Dealey Plaza.

1. I wish it was Laura crying — because he decided to off himself.

I’m so glad the party of caring and compassion has finally assumed full power and are in the position to recognize and act against true evil, aren’t you?

Here’s the video again, just to help drive them even crazier than they already are:

Freudian Slip of the Day: Obama Unwittingly Highlights Problem with Government ‘Solutions’

One sentence in President Obama’s words to reporters (video here) — in which he called Wall Street “shameful” for accepting taxpayer bailout money while continuing to dole out huge bonuses — struck me as an honestly fitting Freudian slip coming from a politician:

“We’ve got a big hole we’ve got to dig ourselves out of.”

In that one sentence we’re shown why government solutions usually only perpetuate problems. When we’re in a hole, they want to keep digging. At least this explains why China holds so much of our debt — we’re tunneling it straight to them.

“Dig yourself out of a hole” is a common saying, but this is wildly counter-productive whenever the government tries to do it, because they only know one direction to dig: straight down. This is why, to me at least, Obama’s words were more Freudian Slip than metaphor.

Statue in Honor of Iraqi Shoe Thrower Touches the Sole

Apparently the Iraqi journalist who threw a shoe at Bush is now the Jimmy Doolittle of the Middle East, because somebody created a piece of “art” in his honor.

From the SF Chronicle:

Iraqi officials share a laugh as they unveil a bronze shoe monument representing the one thrown by Iraqi journalist Muntadhar al-Zaidi at former U.S. President George W. Bush during a press conference in Baghdad, during a ceremony in the northern city of Tikrit, 80 miles north of Baghdad.


Here’s another view.

Wow, the “artist,” Laith al-Amari, is just a jar of whiz away from getting a hefty NEA grant.

Hopefully Bush can commission an American artist to paint a watercolor-on-canvas work depicting what would have happened to this artist and the shoe thrower had they done anything remotely like this during Hussein’s rule. It would be a piece of art that would look just like the one above, except the shoelaces would be missing — because the artist and the shoe thrower would be hanging from them.

George HW Bush on Dealing With a Protester

The week isn’t even over yet, but we’ll go ahead and award “Quote of the Week” to former president George HW Bush. It’s not going to get much funnier than this.

Bush and Bill Clinton spoke at the National Automobile Dealers Association dinner Tuesday, and Bush told a hilarious story of how he once dealt with a pro-choice protester — Clinton followed up with a pretty good line too. Though, had Hillary been there, she might not have laughed as hard as the rest of the audience.

(h/t Ms. Underestimated)

NBC Rejects PETA ‘Salad Shooter’ Ad

PETA produced an ad they wanted to air during the Super Bowl on NBC this coming Sunday. The ad features women whose knees must buckle whenever they go through the produce section of the grocery store. It’s called “Veggie Love.”

NBC has refused to air the ad over concerns of showing a woman “rubbing her pelvic region with pumpkin,” and “screwing herself with broccoli (Gorton’s once tried a very similar marketing strategy to try to get people to eat more of their product but it didn’t work out the way they’d hoped).

In the end, PETA probably ended up with what they wanted — a ton of exposure without having to spend the $3 million for a :30 second ad in the Super Bowl.

Below is the ad. You be the judge of if it’s too hot for the Super Bowl. As for me, I don’t like to have my old-fashioned sense of decency is compromised while I’m trying to watch one of the world’s most violent sports:

‘Veggie Love’: PETA’s Banned Super Bowl Ad

This ad would be worth airing, provided John Madden could use the telestrator to offer running commentary: “She grabs the loose zucchini right there, jukes a little, runs it around the tight end and then BOOM, she’s gone!”

Bombaholics Anonymous: Jihad Rehab in 12 Easy Steps

Yeah, I know; “Jihad rehab? You’re f-in kiddin’ me, right?”

Nope, I’m not kidding:

U.S. lawmakers considering the closure of the controversial Guantanamo Bay detention center will probably be looking at a rehabilitation program in Saudi Arabia that focuses on religious re-education for captured jihadists.

This program is run by the Saudi Arabian government, but if the U.S. sends Gitmo prisoners over there, you know the “new and improved” U.S. Government will have a say in their rehab. Should this occur, just to help move things along, I’ve taken the liberty of writing the following:

12-step program for bombaholics who the U.S. Government sends to Jihad Rehab

1. We admitted we were powerless over Jihad — that our bombings, shootings and beheadings had become unmanageable and that we have a disease caused by others.

2. Came to believe that only a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity — praise be to Obama.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of pacifying American politicians after being promised that we might end up with some stimulus cash in return for not killing infidels.

4. Made a fearless moral inventory on the “pros” and the “cons” of slaughtering non-believers and noted how the “pro” list is heavily influenced by the effects of man-made global warming.

5. Wrote to Al Gore about step 4.

6. Were entirely ready to have Jimmy Carter apologize profusely for the defects of character of those who angered us.

7. Wrote op-ed published in the New York Times outlining America’s shortcomings and pledged to limit our stonings to only those caught drinking liquor, and whores.

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to explain to all of them what they did wrong that caused it to happen and pledged to help them correct it.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever Harry Reid is available to broker their confession of wrongdoing, except when to do so would harm my self esteem.

10. Continued to take personal inventory, and when we were wrong, blamed everything on Bush.

11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with those who might try to get us kicked off US Airways flights even after our successful rehabilitation.

12. Having had a magical awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to bombaholics, and to practice these principles at all future Al Qaeda planning sessions.


“Our ‘Ping pong paddles for belt bombs’ program is going great,” according to the manager of the Jihad Rehab Center.

Dems vs. Limbaugh: Don’t You Wish…

nullDon’t you wish Democrats felt as threatened by Islamofascism as they are by Rush Limbaugh?

Don’t you wish Democrats recognized the right to free speech with the same enthusiasm they recognize the right to an abortion?

Don’t you wish Democrats criticized what Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and Hamas say half as much as they criticize what Rush Limbaugh says?

Don’t you wish Democrats wanted to balance the political makeup of university professors and mainstream media reporters as badly as they want to balance the political makeup of radio talk hosts?

Don’t you wish Democrats would be as blind to race cards as they are blind to the irony in trying to convince people that Rush Limbaugh must be silenced because he’s a threat to free speech?

Don’t you wish Democrats would stop pretending that if Obama fails it will be because Rush Limbaugh wanted him to?

Don’t you wish Democrats wouldn’t be so insecure as to have one of their first actions be to plan for their own failure by identifying a non-Democrat scapegoat just in case?

Don’t you wish Democrats considered dissent to be as patriotic on January 20th as they did on January 19th?

Don’t you wish Democrats petitioned Harry Reid to stop saying the Iraq war was “lost” with the same fervor they petition Limbaugh for saying he wants Obama to “fail”?

Don’t you wish Democrats would be asked to recite a list of all the Nazi and fascist names they would call Republican Party officials who organized a campaign designed to silence a liberal talk show host?

Don’t you wish Democrats would realize that all they’re doing is making it painfully obvious that no amount of power they achieve will ever be enough?

Don’t you wish more Congressional Republicans would have the cojones to loudly point out these things?