House Dems Introduce ‘Liberal Book Sales Stimulus’ Legislation

WASHINGTON DC (PNN): Addressing the striking imbalance in the nation’s non-fiction political book sales was the order of business on Capitol Hill today as Democrats crafted legislation to level the wildly uneven playing field between conservative and liberal book sales.

With the non-fiction political book market completely dominated by conservatives such as Sarah Palin, Glenn Beck, Mark Levin and Michelle Malkin, Rep. Barney Frank (D-MA) has proposed sweeping legislation that will allow liberal books to compete in a marketplace that is unfair to liberal authors due to the disparate nature of conservative vs. liberal book consumers.

According to a statement on Rep. Frank’s website, “My bill will provide public funds to those who may want books by liberal authors, but who don’t buy them because they believe that reading is a basic human right and as such should be provided by government at either low cost or free of charge.”

Rebecca Engersol, a literary sociologist at the University of Chicago, explains: “Simply put, books written by Democrats usually do worse in terms of sales than those written by right-wing authors because Republicans tend to believe in paying for the things they want with their own money. As a result, right-leaning authors have a far easier time selling books than left-leaning authors, whose target audience tends to be more transient or ‘freeloader’ types. If no government program is put into place to correct this disparity, the injustice will only intensify as Sarah Palin’s book nears its release date.”

Engersol claims that even if the bill passes, it could take liberal authors a while to feel the relief. “We’re talking about a wide success gap between the two sides here. For example, Nancy Pelosi’s book sold about as well as pork rinds in Teheran, while Sarah Palin’s forthcoming book is expected to sell at least a couple million copies. A liberal book economy that is oppressed in this manner by the conservative culture’s abject willingness to spend their own money for the things they want and a selfish need to be entertained and enlightened by what they read will take time for the government to force the free market to correct.”

Speaking to a reporter from the New York Times, Frank further justified his stimulus bill. “The purchasing habits of American book-buyers would suggest that they do not like to read books in which their country and its history is dragged through the mud, and this is inherently unfair to the liberal author,” said Frank. “We intend to correct that.”

Rep. John Boehner (R-OH) suggested that taxpayer money would be saved if liberal authors would simply write the books for free, and liberal publishing houses would distribute them for free. This prompted Air America host Randy Robertson, author of “If We All Worked For Free, There Would Be No Greed,” to retort on his program. “How the hell would I pay for my heat and groceries if I did that? This is further proof that Republicans are incredibly out of touch with working-class America.”

Frank’s office says the liberal book sales stimulus bill would be paid for by an additional tax on right-leaning books that Frank says built their success on the spines of left-leaning books.

Government watchdog groups say that the timing of Frank’s bill is suspect, as Frank has a book scheduled for release early in 2010.

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“Look, if you don’t want to read the book, spend your free book stimulus money for the $20 Applebees gift card that will be tucked inside each one, courtesy of the liberal book sales stimulus bill — you’ve got nothing to lose!”

‘Free Polanski!’ – Wacko Celebs Petition Against Arrest of Rapist

Hollywood celebs have run to the defense of cop killers and gang-banging murderers, so it’s really no surprise that they’d defend a guy on the lam for rape:

Woody Allen, Pedro Almodovar and Martin Scorsese have “demanded the immediate release” of fellow filmmaker Roman Polanski, who was arrested in Switzerland on a U.S. arrest warrant related to a 1977 child sex charge.

They were among 138 people in the film industry who signed a petition against the arrest.

Polanski was on the way to the Zurich Film Festival when Swiss police detained him in response to the American warrant.

Woody Allen in particular knows what it’s like to have an affinity for young tail, so his defense of Polanski is no surprise.

Probably the most eloquent legal defense of Polanski I’ve ever heard came from Whoopi Goldberg, who said that Polanski might have committed rape, but not “rape-rape.” I wonder if it wouldn’t be “rape-rape” if the accused were, say, Rush Limbaugh. Whoopi is an idiot… no wait, she’s an idiot-idiot!

Polanski’s celebrity defenders are also using the fact that the woman Polanski raped decades ago wants the charges dropped as reasoning for the authorities to let Polanski off the hook.

Maybe one of these Hollywood idiots who fool themselves into believing they’re champions of the poor should write a script for a movie about a world where felony arrests and convictions are contingent upon the will of the victim to prosecute. This would be a world where the powerful can abuse the poor and powerless and then simply offer the victims cash to drop the charges, and due to economic desperation, the money is accepted and the charges are dropped — while the abuser moves on to other powerless victims. What a “just” world for the downtrodden that would be.

I keep hoping an enterprising reporter for Entertainment Tonight would ask one of these “free Polanski” dipshits if they’d still be supporting Polanski if the 13-year-old girl he drugged and raped were their daughter — but I’m not holding my breath waiting for that question to be asked. And who knows, maybe it wouldn’t bother them. Apparently it’s supposed to be an honor to be raped by a celebrity.

Update: GatewayPundit reminds everyone that Whoopi “drugging and sodomizing a 13-year-old girl wasn’t rape-rape” Goldberg is a Toys R Us spokesperson. Niiiice:

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Hey, Nike just re-signed Michael Vick, so corporate standards just aren’t what they used to be I guess.