Excuse Me? Park51 Developers Apply for Grant From 9/11 Redevelopment Fund

Let it never be said that these people don’t know how to strike more nerves than an overcaffeinated acupuncturist:

Developers of the controversial Park51 Islamic community center and mosque located two blocks from Ground Zero earlier this month applied for roughly $5 million in federal grant money set aside for the redevelopment of lower Manhattan after the attacks of September 11th, according to two sources with direct knowledge of the matter.

Let them get the money from Joy Behar and Whoopi Goldberg instead.

(h/t Weasel Zippers)

TSA Literally Strip-Searches Young Boy, Skies Safer

It just keeps getting more ridiculous.

In this short video (h/t HAP), you can see a boy’s dad standing behind his son, but the dad later moves and it’s clear the TSA has taken the boy’s shirt off and is doing a pat-down on a kid who obviously fits the profile of every terrorist you’ve ever seen.

Taking off a shirt in a crowd of strangers — just the kind of thing a shy kid loves being made to do:

All because nobody at the top is willing to recognize and act on the nature of the threat.

Not only that, but CAIR has requested that the only pat-down of Muslim women by the TSA should be of the head and neck area. CAIR also insists that Muslim women should be giving the option of patting themselves down — you know, just in case they forgot about that bomb they put in their hijab. More pathetic yet, our crack Homeland Security Director Janet Napolitano is reportedly taking it under consideration.

Related: See Doug Ross’s “Foolproof method for avoiding TSA’s new groping procedures.”

Glenn Beck Unsatisfied With ‘Airplane Contrail’ Explanation

What continues to be a little odd is that it took the government so long to determine that this was merely a passenger flight heading toward the west coast of the US. It seems like a two-minute phone call to the FAA could have confirmed that. The government (and many others) say the contrail, as well as what looked like an engine flame, were merely optical illusions caused by twilight conditions, giving it the appearance of a missile.

Maybe it was an airplane, but Beck is unconvinced, as you’ll see below. Beck says he’s talked to sources in the Defense Department, and his theory at least deserves discussion.

I’ve seen optical illusions play tricks with minds before, so that’s certainly possible, but I’ve also seen rocket launches that looked a lot like this too.

Take it away, Glenn:

(h/t The Right Scoop)

Magazine’s Airbrushers Hospitalized for Exhaustion After Preparing ‘Aging Hollywood Lefty’ Issue; Updated

Hollywood liberal stalwarts Susan Sarandon and Jane Fonda, joined by anti-Palin lefty Sigourney Weaver, are out to prove that they’re proud of their ages:

The ageing process is a stressful one for any woman, let alone a Hollywood actress.

But Susan Sarandon, 64, Sigourney Weaver, 61, and Jane Fonda, 72, are showing that being older doesn’t mean not being sexy anymore.
The trio posed in a variety of sultry poses for V Magazine’s upcoming ‘Who Cares About Age’ issue.

Nothing wrong with being proud of your age, right? I mean, who cares? Well, the magazine’s overworked airbrush and Photoshoppers, that’s who.

I think this particular issue is called “What they’d look like after a dozen vodka tonics.” First a picture from the magazine and then another from actual life that they’re supposed to be celebrating:

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It’s always funny when these “keeping it real” stories are as phony as the politics of their subjects.

Here’s Jane Fonda vs. Jane Fonda:

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I didn’t recognize her without the NVA anti-aircraft gun accessory.

The magazine wrote “they look great in these photos!” Sure… but with the same sleight of Photoshop the magazine could have made Michael Moore look like a Playboy centerfold within a half hour — and he might even have a better rack.

V Magazine did nothing but answer their story’s lead question of “who cares about age?” with a resounding, “V Magazine and Susan Sarandon, Jane Fonda and Sigourney Weaver, that’s who!”

The rest of the story is here if you can stand seeing a 72-year-old hippie in a cat outfit laying on a table. Is she being cool, or is it a symptom of dementia? Only the photographer and his three-foot-thick lens filter on loan from Liz Taylor’s White Diamonds commercial shoot knows for sure.

Update: A source tells me that V Magazine is also working on an “liberal & fabulous & over 70” issue featuring men.

Ed Asner’s looking pretty good after the V Magazine treatment:

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The Poop on Portugal’s Obama Enrichment

CBS News’ Mark Knoller, covering the NATO summit, just Tweeted this Obama attempt to “connect” with host-nation Portugal:

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The last time I even heard Obama mention Bo, this was the reference:

Mr. Obama concluded his remarks at about 7:30, saying he couldn’t stay for dinner.

“I’ve got to go home to tuck in the girls and walk the dog and scoop the poop,” he said.

Ah, Portugal!

“As a matter of fact, I even got some Portuguese enrichment stuck on my shoe the other day.”

Update: Obama told the Portuguese that Bo is “the most popular member of the White House.” Hey, even a broken clock is correct twice a day.

Proctologist Wants to Place Colonoscopy Announcement in Government Tax Notices, Government Doesn’t Want the Competition

Somebody finally came up with the perfect insert — if you’ll pardon the expression — for tax notices, but a local tax office didn’t think it would be a good fit:

GRANGEVILLE, Idaho — An Idaho treasurer resisted a doctor’s push to include colonoscopy reminders in annual tax notices, fearing some taxpayers would find the notes “ironic.”

Idaho County Treasurer Sharon Cox denied the request from Dr. Andrew Jones in a letter Tuesday.

Cox says she does not find colon cancer humorous, but given many taxpayer opinions of taxes, “recommending a colonoscopy in the same envelope as the tax notice may be considered ironic.”

That’s not ironic — “ironic” would have been to place “this is a stick-up” notes in with the tax collection forms… maybe along with a free sample:

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Even though the government declined the colonoscopy announcement, the government did end up offering the doctor a job with the TSA.

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Liberal Outrage of the Day: Football Team’s Trick Play a Form of Child Abuse

Whenever you need a laugh, you can always count on those kooky, publicly funded balls of laughs at NPR.

Oh, but first, if you haven’t seen it, watch the video of the middle school football team’s trick play so it all makes sense:

Now the outrage:

The play is legal, and just about everybody who has seen it gets a real hoot out of it. In one online poll, 92.1 percent of those who voted said the play was genius.

Well, it isn’t funny, and it isn’t right.
[…]
But the Driscoll team didn’t act instinctively to try to put one over on a ref. The middle schoolers didn’t even come up with the ruse. Their coach dreamed up the play, and even participated in it, hollering from the sideline. The referees weren’t victimized. In fact, they had to play along.

No, it was only the other team’s kids who were embarrassed and belittled by a children’s coach being a wise guy, a bully of sorts. It wasn’t genius at all; rather, it was a form of child abuse. Sure, it was legal, but it wasn’t fair.

Laugh at kids being outslicked by a grown-up, and you’re cruel. That isn’t sport.

Laughing at grown-up liberals, now there’s a sport!

Somebody please tell this guy the game ended in an automatic, “no hurt feelings” mandated tie so he’ll calm down! I will confess to being somewhat surprised he didn’t blame Bush for the mean trick play.

Aren’t most plays are designed to fool the other team? Otherwise there would be no need for a huddle — or maybe the author thinks all the players do in there is bitch about global warming and Gitmo.

(h/t Weasel Zippers)

Special Places in Hell, Part XXIV: Voting on Whether or Not to Have an Abortion

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Even if this is a hoax, these people are subhuman gravy buckets:

The Arnolds are having a baby. Unless the public votes to have the child aborted. Meet the couple behind Birthornot.com, where “you can vote and choose whether we abort or keep our unborn child.”

Pete and Alisha Arnold, both 30, both tech professionals, live in the Minneapolis suburb of Apple Valley and have been married for 10 years. Since September, they’ve blogged about their expected child at birthornot.com, posting health updates about the mother and the fetus (which will be 17 weeks-old tomorrow), and ultrasound pictures and video. But at the top of the blog is a poll hosted by PollDaddy.com. The question: “Should We Give Birth or Have an Abortion?” “Give Birth” has 46 percent of the vote at the moment, with “Have an Abortion” at 54 percent. The poll closes on December 7th.

Too bad there’s not a spot for write-in votes — I’d go with “Keep the baby, abort the parents.”

This Just in From the ‘Ya Don’t Say’ Department

From an article about Joe Biden getting misty at a farewell party for Chris Dodd:

Dodd and Biden served in the Senate together for decades, along with Patrick Leahy of Vermont, who was also present, and the late Ted Kennedy. The bond between Dodd and Kennedy was particularly strong.

Very strong. Often the two would be seen sharing a sandwich together.

Update: By way of Michelle Malkin, I think Dodd can hear us picking on him:

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Police Standoff at Wacko’s Home After Bristol Palin Not Voted Off Dancing with the Stars

You’ve heard of Palin Derangement Syndrome, but here’s something Cubachi calls “Bristol Derangement Syndrome.”

From Fox News:

Authorities say a man enraged over Sarah Palin’s daughter’s dance routine on a reality TV show blasted his television with a shotgun, leading to an overnight standoff with police.

A Dane County Sheriff’s detective says in court documents that Steven Cowan, of the rural town of Vermont, felt 20-year-old Bristol Palin was not a good dancer and was only on the “Dancing with the Stars” because of her famous mother, the Republican former vice presidential candidate.

They say Cowan, 67, loaded his shotgun and blasted the TV before turning the gun on his wife, who escaped. Tactical officers surrounded the home and managed to talk Cowan out Tuesday morning.

The Smoking Gun has the mugshot of a freak who takes his dancing seriously!

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Gee, he certainly looks stable — but the hospital shirt’s a dead giveaway that he’s a frequent guest of the Cuckoo’s Nest.

This idiot’s not alone — here’s a columnist who only thinks Bristol’s still on the show because lots of people are voting for her. Imagine that! There’s nothing worse than when a popularity contest gets hijacked by the population.

Update: If the police really want to make this guy go off (pun intended), in addition to his rights, they’ll also inform him that Rush Limbaugh voted for Bristol.