Too much seriousness going on out there today, so for a while let’s talk about what we’re being told might be the first gay caveman:

The male body – said to date back to between 2900-2500BC – was discovered buried in a way normally reserved only for women of the Corded Ware culture in the Copper Age.

The skeleton was found in a Prague suburb in the Czech Republic with its head pointing eastwards and surrounded by domestic jugs, rituals only previously seen in female graves.

“From history and ethnology, we know that people from this period took funeral rites very seriously so it is highly unlikely that this positioning was a mistake,” said lead archaeologist Kamila Remisova Vesinova.

“Far more likely is that he was a man with a different sexual orientation, homosexual or transsexual,” she added.

Another dead giveaway — and sort of a bonus discovery — was that he was clutching the world’s oldest Cher CD.

The man is believed to have lived during a period of world history that scientists refer to as the Minnelli Epoch.


8 Responses to “Friday Afternoon Sorbet: First Gay Caveman Edition”

  1. Nanny on April 8th, 2011 4:39 pm

    That skelton looks just like Barry Manilow!!!

  2. Marshall_Will on April 8th, 2011 6:45 pm

    Oh God! Here we go again. The slightest 'evidence' and the "scientific community" is disparaging what was probably a very brave man, fitting him for Ru Paul's wardrobe.

    Ran out of room? Sudden death, wanted to be buried close to spouse? Discounted! We're going w/ GAY! Thanks Doug, too funny!

    Taking poll on MM to see if she'll replace Beck. You could be like her Greg Gutfeld ( only funnier! )

  3. Joe Redfield on April 8th, 2011 6:48 pm

    Was he wearing a wedding ring?

  4. The Watcher on April 8th, 2011 7:32 pm

    '“Far more likely is that he was a man with a different sexual orientation, homosexual or transsexual,” [lead archaeologist Kamila Remisova Vesinova] added.'

    'Far more likely is that lead archaeologist Kamila Remisova Vesinova has an agenda-ax to grind.'

  5. SignPainterGuy on April 8th, 2011 8:06 pm

    Ditto !

  6. Nanny on April 8th, 2011 8:29 pm

    Or that he got a thrill up his leg when he saw that skelton!!!

  7. SignPainterGuy on April 8th, 2011 8:16 pm

    Just curious, when did the destruction of Soddam and Gomorah occur (sp) ? Somehow my mind is stuck on a pre-2500 BC date ! And the sons of Noah after the Great Flood !?

    There`s no mention of any obvious "limp-wristedness" or "comfortable shoes" !

  8. OK_Loyalist on April 8th, 2011 9:14 pm

    I believe this is known as the Pre-drape arranging era.

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