Comcast Offers Cheap Internet if Your Child Gets Free School Lunches

Some days I feel almost like a chump for being stupid enough to work and pay for everything I have out of my own pocket — including my kids’ lunches and regular price for Internet access:

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Not to be an a-hole for daring suggest this, but how about cheaper Internet service for people who do pay for their kids’ lunches? Might they need a break even more?

You can tell Comcast is headed up by Hope & Change Kool Aid guzzlers because they seem to think the people who deserve a break the most are the parents who allow their kids to be wards of the state.

Why? Because Comcast cares. Have very little income? Comcast is there to improve the human condition. Family on food stamps? Not an issue, we’ll sign you up, and at lower rates! Have you missed mortgage or car payments? No big deal! Got an over-due Comcast bill? NOW THERE’S A PROBLEM!

I haven’t looked into this much yet, but I can’t help but wonder if Comcast doesn’t have some sort of sweetheart tax deal with the government that pretty much refunds them whatever this cut from their regular rates costs them in return for helping promote dependency. Yes, I’m that skeptical today, but in a world where free cell phones are now a civil right, anything’s possible.

Update:

You just knew there was a government element at work:

As part of its merger with NBC Universal earlier this year, Comcast is required to provide 2.5 million low-income households with high-speed Internet for less than $10 a month; computers for less than $150 a month; and digital literacy training, according to the Federal Communications Commission.

“Comcast: Because we care — we had to or the merger wouldn’t go through…”

Author: Doug Powers

Doug Powers is a writer, editor and commentator covering news of the day from a conservative viewpoint with an occasional shot of irreverence and a chaser of snark. Townhall Media writer/editor. MichelleMalkin.com alum. Bowling novice. Long-suffering Detroit Lions fan. Contact: WriteDoug@Live.com.