Do they really wonder why growing numbers of people are so skeptical?

It may not rank as the most compelling reason to curb greenhouse gases, but reducing our emissions might just save humanity from a pre-emptive alien attack, scientists claim.

Watching from afar, extraterrestrial beings might view changes in Earth’s atmosphere as symptomatic of a civilisation growing out of control – and take drastic action to keep us from becoming a more serious threat, the researchers explain.

This highly speculative scenario is one of several described by a Nasa-affiliated scientist and colleagues at Pennsylvania State University that, while considered unlikely, they say could play out were humans and alien life to make contact at some point in the future.
“Green” aliens might object to the environmental damage humans have caused on Earth and wipe us out to save the planet. “These scenarios give us reason to limit our growth and reduce our impact on global ecosystems. It would be particularly important for us to limit our emissions of greenhouse gases, since atmospheric composition can be observed from other planets,” the authors write.

This might just give the White House the rationale it needs to act on Paul Krugman’s advice to save the economy.


17 Responses to “Consensus of Scientists Say Space Aliens Might Destroy Humanity Because of Global Warming”

  1. Steve on August 19th, 2011 12:53 pm

    And THIS is what NASA has been reduced to?? What an embarrasment for Obama's legacy!!

  2. Marshall_Will on August 19th, 2011 1:20 pm

    “Green” aliens might object to the environmental damage humans have caused on Earth and wipe us out to save the planet."

    WTF? I don't even know what to say to that? Having lived in disaster-prone Philippines for years, I consider myself something of an expert on the matter.

    While vacating our home during continual floods ( something you just have to see for yourself ) the key was to give your home every appearance it had -already- been ransacked. Not only am I no longer on that bandwagon, we refuse to even RECYCLE. Sorry Green Progs, you brought it on yourselves!

  3. Joe Redfield on August 19th, 2011 1:43 pm

    I think we can now say, with certainty, that science has won the battle with the Global Warming scammers; they haven't just reached the bottom of the barrel of reasons to support their Ponzi scheme, they have punched a hole in it and are now drilling towards the center of the Earth.

  4. sizemorew on August 19th, 2011 2:19 pm

    Okay, this is an easy claim to refute. If I was an alien looking for some place to chill and I looked at a planet that had major global warming, I'd be more like "guess I'm heading elsewhere" not "OMG NUKE THEM". After all, it's not my planet. Let the locals muck it up all they want. I don't have to go there.

    Though if I was a hippie alien, I'd probably have some sort of weird sit in to try and get other aliens to boycott Earth until the humans changed their ways.

    Apparently, the aliens these guys are afraid of are intergalactic eco nuts.

  5. Dexter_Alarius on August 19th, 2011 2:28 pm

    Before monitoring our atmosphere, those ETs would be monitoring our RF transmissions (Radio, TV). I'm worried they'll see Chrissie Mathews or Keith Uberdouche and decided our race is irredeemably stupid and vaporize the lot of us.

    I think there's some grant money we can divert to the National Debt Fund.

  6. SignPainterGuy on August 19th, 2011 2:40 pm

    The pRes. was almost right; change just a few words and it becomes: "At some point I do think some people are just stupid enough !"

  7. Columba on August 19th, 2011 3:08 pm

    Not to worry … If the aliens are "greenies," they won't have the technology even to get here, let alone do any damage. Come to think of it, if they're greenies, they'll be too busy destroying their own society to do anything to ours.

  8. Doug on August 19th, 2011 3:18 pm

    Bahaha! Good point… and even if they try to get here, their space-Volt will run out of battery power before they even get to the Kuiper belt ("green" kook theory: there are charging stations on the dark side of the moon).

  9. SignPainterGuy on August 19th, 2011 3:54 pm

    Come on Doug, doncha know that any serious greenie space traveler is gonna have the "solar-roof" option and pull a spare battery trailer ? (stream-lined teardrop shaped of course)

  10. Hyperfobea on August 19th, 2011 3:35 pm

    Our tax dollars hard at work, and all for the standard tripe coming out of govt-funded universities and NASA … makes me want to vomit.

  11. The Zoo Keeper on August 19th, 2011 4:25 pm

    Like all those 1950's sci-fi B movies, there's a much deeper context going on here. They're really just projecting their fears of the Tea Party "menace" that is threatening the status quo of D.C.

  12. SignPainterGuy on August 19th, 2011 4:34 pm

    True dat !

    "Projection", it`s not just for breakfast anymore !!

  13. backwoods on August 19th, 2011 4:28 pm

    How many voters are they alienating with this kind of talk?

  14. Marshall_Will on August 19th, 2011 4:52 pm


    Sushhhh! ( Let 'em keep talking man )

    Can we DEFUND all the Junk Science already?

  15. backwoods on August 19th, 2011 5:08 pm

    If warped thinking led to warp drive the liberals would have invented it a long time ago.

  16. ScottB on August 19th, 2011 5:59 pm

    yeah I've seen this one before:

    They blow up Earth to make way for the intergalactic highway and the meaning of life is 42. 😉

  17. backwoods on August 19th, 2011 6:05 pm

    Obama may be totally out to lunch, but he is no Zaphod Beeblebrox. It is infinitely improbable that he will ever be that good.

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