White House Announces $15 Trillion Jobs Plan to Switch Around Wyoming and Colorado

WASHINGTON DC (TPTB News): When it was announced that President Obama would be making a trip to California, Washington and Colorado, the White House released the following map featuring the three states included in the President’s tour:

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Eagle-eyed bloggers immediately noticed that a state highlighted as one to be visited by Obama was in fact Wyoming instead of Colorado, and assumed they’d caught a mistake. But the joke is apparently on them, because after the White House was notified of the “error,” they had an announcement to make.

“Actually, that’s not a mistake,” according White House Press Secretary Jay Carney. “The President didn’t really want it to come out just yet, but since it did, here goes… we’re going to create up to eight million new construction and van-lines jobs by moving Wyoming to where Colorado is, and Colorado to where Wyoming is.”

Carney, when pressed by ABC’s Jake Tapper on the cost of the latest jobs initiative, was candid. “Look, you know moving two entire states will require a significant up-front investment — probably in the range of $15 trillion — but our plan is completely paid for because eventually that guy from Google is going to pay higher taxes.”

The latest White House jobs plan came as a surprise to some Republicans. “This is obviously just a desperate attempt to cover for them mixing up Colorado and Wyoming on some stupid map that was handed out to the press,” said Speaker of the House John Boehner (R-OH). “But I hardly think that justifies spending $15 trillion to flip the states just so their map is correct and they don’t look like idiots.”

White House Communications Director Dan Pfeiffer, after being informed what the Speaker had said, took Boehner to task. “This is just another example of Republicans being clueless when it comes to job creation in America. Switching Wyoming and Colorado will create millions of jobs.”

Pfieffer continued. “The two states are even the same shape and the same size, so our plan actually cuts long-term debt because switching Wyoming and Colorado is far cheaper than switching two states not shaped the same — say, Idaho and Michigan — which would cost upwards of $20 trillion to switch around, and with no net gain in new jobs.”

Speaking at a fundraiser in California, President Obama pitched the latest plan. “Pass the Switching Around Wyoming and Colorado Equals Jobs Act! Pass this bill and restore the promise of the Founding Fathers that free men and women shouldn’t have to go so far north to get to Casper, and so far south to get to Denver! Pass this bill and let Billings have a turn at being known as the ‘Mile High City’ for a change… it’s only fair. That’s what fundamental change is all about.”

After being informed that Billings is in Montana and not Wyoming, Obama was quick to point out that he inherited that from the previous administration but pledged to correct the injustice by way of an amendment to his Switching Around Wyoming and Colorado (Plus Moving Billings to Wyoming) Equals Jobs Act.

Many economists are praising the latest Obama jobs plan as good news for the US economy. “This is even better than my alien invasion idea,” exclaimed Nobel Prize winning economist and New York Times columnist Paul Krugman.

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“Switching around Wyoming and Colorado is imperative to putting America back to work,” according to Senior Obama Advisor David Plouffe, above.

Author: Doug Powers

Doug Powers is a writer, editor and commentator covering news of the day from a conservative viewpoint with an occasional shot of irreverence and a chaser of snark. Townhall Media writer/editor. MichelleMalkin.com alum. Bowling novice. Long-suffering Detroit Lions fan. Contact: WriteDoug@Live.com.