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“I’d better keep this sh*t away from the Department of Energy or we’ll all go bankrupt”

*****

Energy Secretary Steven Chu used the movie The Avengers, which I saw last weekend, to segue into another pitch to keep dumping taxpayer dollars down the “clean energy” money incinerator.

By way of Erika Johnsen at Hot Air, here’s Chu writing on his Facebook page:

I can rarely find the time to make it to the movies, but my staff is buzzing about The Avengers, which focuses on a new, limitless clean energy source called “The Tesseract.” In the film, there is evidently an intergalactic struggle to claim this new resource – one we can only win by relying on heroes like Captain America, Thor, Iron Man, Black Widow, and the Incredible Hulk. Naturally, the group includes a couple scientists!

While the “Tesseract” may be fictional, the real-life global competition over clean energy is growing increasingly intense, as countries around the world sense a huge economic opportunity AND the opportunity for cleaner air, water, and a healthier planet. This is now a $260 billion global market, a sum that would impress even Tony Stark. According to the International Energy Agency, last year — for the first time — more money was invested worldwide in clean, renewable power plants than in fossil fuel power plants.

Given how big the opportunity is, and how fast it is growing, it is no surprise that 80 countries have adopted policies or incentives to capture a share of the clean energy market. The good news is that we have an advantage every bit as powerful as the Incredible Hulk: Americans’ talent for entrepreneurship and innovation is unrivalled [sic] by any other country in the world. We have world-leading scientific facilities that would make Bruce Banner green with envy, and the investments we’re making today in groundbreaking new technologies can help American businesses stay ahead of the curve.

Ultimately, however, the clean energy prize is still up for grabs and countries like China are competing aggressively. It’s not enough for us to simply invent the technologies of the future, we need to actually build and deploy them here as well. As President Obama noted recently, one step Congress should take immediately is to renew the expiring tax credits for clean energy – a step that will create jobs and help American companies compete. When it comes to clean energy, our motto should be: “Invented in America, Made in America, Sold Around the World.”

When I saw The Avengers, I just knew when they got to the part about the the “Tesseract” — the limitless clean energy source — that it would make greenies with plenty of access to other people’s money harder than Chris Matthews stuck in an elevator with Obama.

Here’s the catch though, and it’s sort of fits metaphorically:

The villain in the movie is Loki — an Asgardian god who is also the archenemy (and adoptive brother) of Thor.

Loki seeks the Tesseract because it will open a portal in space through which the aliens from Chitauri will travel to earth in order to enslave mankind. Loki believes that freedom is an illusion and that it is the destiny of humans to be subservient to those who are their intellectual superiors (“Freedom is a disease and servitude is the cure”). As his only concern was with increasing his own power, Loki wanted this magical “clean energy” source as a way to take control of rubes, not for any altruistic reason — to save people from “global warming” or anything like that. Gee, the only thing missing was Loki telling people they should let him control the Tesseract because of all the jobs that would be “saved or created.”

I’m told that in the sequel Loki will come to earth in search of algae fuel.

Oh, and to top it off, The Avengers — Iron Man specifically — ended up destroying the Chitaurian army and closing the Tesseract portal with an atomic bomb. I don’t know if Chu and his fellow greenies saw that part. Chu must think they plugged the hole with unused Solyndra solar panels or something.

Comments

24 Responses to “Clean Energy Fantasy: Steven Chu on The Avengers”

  1. backwoodsconsr on May 19th, 2012 11:16 am

    Ah, Chu!

  2. clu seatoe on May 19th, 2012 11:58 am

    For those of you who’ve been wondering, now you know why Hollywood is so important to the kids in DC. They live in a comic book fantasy.

    From the lips of an energy genius to your ears. Chu should stick to Betty Boop cartoons.

  3. Joe Redfield on May 19th, 2012 1:32 pm

    I thought 'unobtainium' was the key to our future energy independence…or was that last year? Or was it the key to something else…hmm,…maybe I should go to the movies more often(I've been twice in the last six years) to keep up with the latest developments in science. Also, wouldn't Egor have been a more appropriate name for the villain?

  4. Marshall_Will on May 19th, 2012 2:08 pm

    Unobtanium..? Isn't directly adjacent Fantasium ( FU ) on the Atomic Chart? Or was that Nerdium? Where's an 8th Grade science geek when you need them!

    "Tesseract" ( unimaginative play on Tesla, an acutal inventor ) was designed for the Chu in ALL of us. For a guy that "doesn't have much time for movies" he launches into the same breathless detail my recently assigned *boot camp* Airman did. At least Doug took some time off.

  5. clu seatoe on May 19th, 2012 3:49 pm

    “Fantasium ( FU ) on the Atomic Chart?”

    …or… Fantasium (FUBAR) on the Chu Chart?

  6. jeffythequick on May 19th, 2012 4:28 pm

    Between Unicorn Farts and that $25 Trillion stuff that will solve all of our problems, and make Heaven on Earth.

    There are too many consumers of Progressive BS out there to let this market slip away.

  7. swede on May 19th, 2012 5:15 pm

    Barack bless you!

  8. Marshall_Will on May 19th, 2012 10:15 pm

    Yep, and behind every OWS .99%'er is another wannabe' Tesla surely deluding him/her/itself that something "totally rad" is just another bong tube away.

    Recall the footage from Zuccotti Park where Kamp Alinsky Kids toil away on a 10-speed hooked to a 'generator'. Well… they're not the first to have attempted this and even a *World Class* cyclist can generate more than a few milli-amps. It'd take an hour's exertion to create enough to get (1) shave out of an electric razor.

    Depending on how tough your beard is. How many calories is that again..?

  9. jeffythequick on May 19th, 2012 10:51 pm

    will,

    I thought about doing that for the kids to power the TV, but they're (the ones at home, at least) are 6, 4, and 2. But they have enough energy. However, I do think more than a few milliwatts would come of it.

    I was thinking that the human doing a decent run would generate about 125 Watts, enough to power a MacBook Air for about 14 hours (the lowest one has a 35 Watt-Hour Battery and lasts about 5 hours, so the math is 7Watt-Hours).

    Not a bad deal, but they'll need someone on a bike to power that cellular receiver, the cell tower, and the switches that route all that Internet traffic that comes their way.

    Then again, something good happens to a man that sees the exertion of his muscles causing something to happen. Something even more wonderful happens when he sees someone NOT exerting their muscles riding on that person's work.

    ref: http://www.menshealth.com/fitness/human-power-genhttp://www.apple.com/macbookair/specs.html

    Also assuming 100% efficiency, which they'll learn doesn't happen either… ;)

  10. SignPainterGuy on May 20th, 2012 12:17 am

    Well, I can`t say how much energy I generated, or even how efficient I was, but I mowed my whole yard in one day (usually take two days), and sadly, I got absolutely no response or reaction from any of my neighbors. OK, the widow lady across the street waved as she mowed part of her yard.

    I can say, I was 90% worn out and I feel 80% better after a shower, but since I couldn`t smell while I was mowing, I have no idea how much better I smell now ! ;-)

  11. jeffythequick on May 20th, 2012 12:27 am

    SPG,

    How did you get your avatar to show up on Lonely Conservative's site?
    http://lonelyconservative.com/2012/05/epic-fail-s

  12. SignPainterGuy on May 20th, 2012 1:06 am

    I have a WordPress commenter acct.

  13. joyannaadams on May 20th, 2012 2:58 pm

    I have a dream….the Hulk in the same room with Chu…

  14. authentic ant on May 20th, 2012 9:58 pm

    I'll have faith in Chu's deranged fantasy projection when some random cancer patient becomes the Hulk thanks to radiation. What dopes we have in government.

  15. Marshall_Will on May 21st, 2012 11:45 am

    Jeff,

    My good friend Robert Cote` ( Exurbanation ) has fought the good fight against anti-capitalist Progs and their perceived 'evils' of Urban Sprawl for the last several decades.

    One of the common threads to all their agendas include the soccer mom that uses a Ford Excursion to return a DVD. Robert carried out the math and the human -walking- to return the DVD actually burns more calories ( hence more *energy* ) to accomplish same goal.

    The tractor burning diesel in the field, the truck to get that food to market etc. Just a matter of fighting common misconceptions/DEceptions of the Prog agenda on any and all fronts.

  16. Marshall_Will on May 21st, 2012 11:47 am

    Doug's Led Zep link in upper left a Monday must read! The Other McCain gets your week off to a rockin' good start.

  17. backwoodsconsr on May 21st, 2012 11:48 am

    I was wondering who would come up with a good response to that. Nicely done.

  18. jeffythequick on May 21st, 2012 12:32 pm

    I'd like to see that math, just for information purposes. I don't mind being wrong, as long as I learn something in the process, but when I do state something, I cite where I get the info from, hence the Men's Health article.

  19. Marshall_Will on May 21st, 2012 1:44 pm

    Jeff,

    No one's 'wrong' here. Point being, Urban Leftists have gotten away telling their side and their side ONLY for years. Robert just wanted to bring to light, energy expended in ALL forms requires *fuel*.

    Further, he notes, that Sprawl becomes its own end, WHEN "the jobs move to where the people are!" Only early in their formation are they distant, disconnected bedroom communities. Capitalism being the greedy whore that it is, won't be long before grocery stores, dry cleaners, movie theaters and yes, ultimately manufacturing rears its ugly head!

    GOD I love this country!

  20. clu seatoe on May 21st, 2012 2:01 pm

    “Page: Well, we’re still a trifle upset with him about the Physical Grafitti reference on Appetite for Taxation. “Fiscal Graft Party” makes us out to be thieves and chiselers. He claims it was all some kind of a joke, but the only one laughing is Bill Maher. Those hyena-like sounds coming out of Chris Matthews might also be laughter, come to think of it.”

    This interview had to be scripted. It’s so contradictive. Hey, the term contradictive just put a thought in my head: maybe Zero does belong to Zeppelin.

  21. Marshall_Will on May 21st, 2012 2:43 pm

    Yeah the photoshop of Bammie as Jimi Hendrix was priceless. I think that flower power get up Jimi had was from "Monterrey Pop Festival".

    Cuzz' ya' know, People talk about me like I was a dog!

    Like Doug says, some of this stuff writes itself…

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