Caroline Biden Succumbs to the Enormous Pressures of Being a Dunderheaded Vice President’s Niece

You’d think it would be awesome to be related to Joe Biden, just for how smart you’d look in comparison at the family reunions. However, some people just can’t handle the stress of being related to a goofy gaffe-machine who is one heartbeat away from being the second worst president in history:

Uncle Joe is making her life a living hell.

Friends say Caroline ­Biden is a “hot mess” with a history of booze and pill addiction — and she blames it all on the tremendous pressure she faces being the vice president’s niece.

“She would complain about it all the time,” a confidant, socialite Paul Johnson Calderon, said without a hint of sarcasm.

“She’s surrounded by a lot of people who use her because of who she is. Guys would want to date her because of who her ­uncle is.”

When I was younger, if women wanted to date me because of who my uncle was I totally could have handled that, but not everybody can.

Uncle Joe has probably already contacted her and said something incredibly embarrassing by now.

Author: Doug Powers

Doug Powers is a writer, editor and commentator covering news of the day from a conservative viewpoint with an occasional shot of irreverence and a chaser of snark. Townhall Media writer/editor. MichelleMalkin.com alum. Bowling novice. Long-suffering Detroit Lions fan. Contact: WriteDoug@Live.com.