Oct

15

Michelle Obama’s ‘Turnip’ Vine provides sufficient distraction from other grave problems

Filed Under Politics | 16 Comments

Considering ISIS, Ebola and all sorts of other major problems all Dems are talking about right now is how awesome this is (seriously, they’re wetting themselves over it), the White House knows exactly what kind of shiny objects distract their base:

You make the call, America… do we like our First Lady’s doing stuff like this?

Suggested GOP response: “Turnip at the polls next month to get Democrats out of office!”

Comments

16 Responses to “Michelle Obama’s ‘Turnip’ Vine provides sufficient distraction from other grave problems”

  1. Marshall_Will on October 15th, 2014 3:33 pm

    Add turnips to the last of Stuff This First Family Has Permanently Destroyed.

    1. Fist bump
    2. Swagga
    3. Shout out
    4. Rutabagas
    5. ?

  2. Doug on October 15th, 2014 5:36 pm

    5. The American dream?

  3. Truesoldier__ on October 15th, 2014 9:00 pm

    Didn't her mother ever tell her not to play with her food? Oh wait, I forgot, she only tells school kids and the country to eat things like turnips while she stuffs her pie hole with ice cream and burgers….

  4. backwoodsconsr on October 15th, 2014 10:05 pm

    Turnips and Moochelle in the same video? There isn't enough eye bleach in the world.

  5. backwoodsconsr on October 15th, 2014 10:23 pm

    "I paid $700 to give my kid karate lessons. Now he tells me to eat my vegetables."

    –Rodney Dangerfield

  6. Marshall_Will on October 16th, 2014 2:39 pm

    Good catch, should've made that #1. My bad.

  7. Marshall_Will on October 16th, 2014 2:50 pm

    Just ramping up for the CDC testimony and Friedan was composed, but COMICAL nonetheless. Gave a great description of what his organization SHOULD have done.

    Here's the thing, virtually every gov. agency has already had their Ebola Moment, epically FAILING in the very function they were designed to do! The VA, the IRS, DOE and now the CDC.

    The brazen hijacking and politicizing of these institutions has left them near completely hollowed OUT. They've become shells, but very expensive shells that require constant feeding. It's all fine and well until they're actually called upon to perform their core function. Then the folly becomes altogether too obvious.

    What happens when there's a grid collapse and we find the DOE burned thru its entire budget rubber stamping blue sky crony alt. energy pipe dreams? Keeping America running is a fragile thing. As we found out after 9/11. God help us…

  8. backwoodsconsr on October 16th, 2014 3:04 pm

    So Obama gets a report on Ebola in West Africa.
    He is told: “Two Brazilian volunteer medics have contracted Ebola”
    Obama stares ahead — stock still. Then he starts shaking.
    Finally, he asks: “How many is a brazillion?”

  9. Marshall_Will on October 16th, 2014 3:26 pm

    Da-dish!

    Incredibly, while responding to questioning from Fred Upton, Dr. Friedan's testimony and response as to why a Travel BAN simply isn't an option, it was MUTED by a "National Weather Service Monthly Test".

    Can you freaking believe that? There was no audio accompanying the banner scroll, so why edit the testimony audio? There are no coincidences in Obamaland. Anyone comes up w/ the transcript, please post here! TIA.

  10. Marshall_Will on October 16th, 2014 3:30 pm

    In essence, prior to redacting, the good doctor admitted our broken immigration system would only lead to gaming the system and DID you use the term "porous border".

    Insofar as I can tell, Doctor F. just ain't playin' ball. He doesn't appear to be sticking to the script and seems to realize these "global pandemic things" can get kinda' serious. In admitting the lapses both at checkpoints and hospitals he flatly concedes fault.

    I know Prezzie fiss'bump will want to get him over to the hot zone asap.

  11. backwoodsconsr on October 16th, 2014 4:13 pm

    Obama learning a new number has frightening implications for the federal budget.

  12. backwoodsconsr on October 16th, 2014 6:59 pm

    I think a brazillion is the number of dollars women wish they had stuffed into their undergarments.

  13. Truesoldier__ on October 16th, 2014 9:17 pm

    Basically he admitted that a travel ban had come up, but refused to go any further and say whether the CDC had recommended it and dear leader disapproved it or whether it was just a passing thought that was dismissed by everyone.

    My money is on the first choice.

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