Driving home from the dentist earlier I heard Rush mention this bit of predictable progressive hilarity that’s no doubt coming to the U.S. before too long (if it isn’t here already).

No, seriously, that’s not from The Onion — it’s a story from ABC Radio, the Australian Broadcasting Corporation.
This pullquote running with the article is progressive gold:

Remember, only by ensuring that our kids are helpless dipshit wards of the state can we truly have equality for the children!