Coach Nick ‘Rodham’ Saban: Master motivator

If this quote in a forthcoming book about Nick Saban is accurate, the Alabama coach is a master motivator for getting his players’ minds off distracting thoughts and back on the field of play:

The Alabama football coach imparts life lessons in a new biography by Monte Burke, and though the book itself isn’t out yet, an excerpt was published on Twitter Monday where Saban is giving his players dating advice.

From the excerpt:

“‘Guys out there chasing pussy, having all of these kids. And then you come in here and try to play football. Ultimately it’s a distraction. Ultimately, you don’t want to be out there chasing after midnight. If you haven’t locked it up by midnight, it’s not worth it.’”

“At this point Saban paused and shuffled on his feet. The color had risen in his face. His players had no idea what to expect next.”

“‘Ultimately, you never want to sleep with anybody who has less to lose than you do,’ he said, ‘So, ultimately, if I’m ever going to sleep around on Miss Terry, it’s going to be with Hillary Fucking Rodham Clinton.’”

Saban’s players immediately ran from the locker room and became practitioners of Buddhist monasticism.

Bill Clinton then swooped in and hit on their confused girlfriends.