Monthly Archives: February 2016

Alan Grayson saying Republicans want people to ‘die in the streets’ is as ironic as it gets

Progressive hypocrite Alan Grayson’s under House ethics investigation for running a hedge fund that was located on the Cayman Islands all while he was back in the halls of Congress blasting companies that take advantage of offshore tax shelters.

Grayson’s also returned to his old accusations about Republicans:

Republicans want people who get sick to die quickly in the streets?

Hilarious, considering the business model of the Grayson fund:

Interviews and the documents show that Mr. Grayson told potential investors in his hedge fund that they should contribute money to the fund to capitalize on the unrest he observed around the world, and to take particular advantage when there was “blood in the streets.”

Project much, Alan?

Hillary finally nails down a firm position: Against bad things and for good things

This is really all she’s got, and so far it’s been good enough, which is amazing:

The United States is not a single-issue country, Hillary Clinton told CNN’s “State of the Union” on Sunday. She said she wants to “knock down all the barriers that are holding people back.”

“Of course, a lot of it is economic, and it needs to be addressed. That’s why I’m not only against bad things, and I want to stop them. I want to start some good things, more good-paying jobs with rising incomes again; once and for all making sure women get equal pay for the work we do; doing more to help small business; going after clean, renewable energy, especially in a state like Nevada, where it should be the solar capital of the West.”

That’s now a part of her campaign rhetoric, and it’s even more ridiculous when she says it wrong:

Smartest woman in the world, ladies and gentlemen!

Maybe she’s just nervous because the footsteps behind her are getting louder.

Smell a rat? Feds spend $10 million to address gender bias in selection of… research mice

There’s a reason some of the wealthiest counties in the U.S. are those near Washington, D.C., and part of the reason is the government’s creativity when it comes to excuses for spending our money:

The National Institutes of Health spent over $10 million to address gender disparities in research — among mice.

“There’s been a male tilt to biomedical research for a long time,” according to a report published by NPR. “The National Institutes of Health is trying to change that and is looking to bring gender balance all the way down to the earliest stages of research. As a condition of NIH funding, researchers will now have to include female and male animals in their biomedical studies.”

The agency announced in 2014 it would spend $10.1 million for scientists to “add a sex/gender lens to their currently funded research projects.”

Those who object to millions in taxpayer dollars being spent in such a way will be addressed by a separate $10 million dollar program to shame “mice sexists” in society.

Hillary’s latest endorsement in Nevada will get a big thumbs-up from Bill

Workers at the Moonlite Bunny Ranch in Nevada are letting the world know that a Hillary Clinton presidency would be good for sex workers:

Bill’s going to dispatch himself to Nevada immediately just to, you know, make sure they know the ropes when it comes to campaigning:

The woman seeking America’s top job is getting a boost from the world’s oldest profession.

Ahead of the Nevada Democratic caucuses this weekend, a group of sex workers operating under the name Hookers for Hillary is going all in for Hillary Clinton’s campaign – touting her positions on health care and other issues.

According to The Guardian, brothel owner Dennis Hof and the girls at the Moonlite Bunny Ranch launched the pro-Clinton project shortly after she entered the race.

In interviews with the newspaper, they described their support as an endorsement of Clinton’s efforts to combat domestic violence as well. And one simply described it as a case of women helping women.

“We’re helping Hillary and we’re helping ourselves. Women should help other women, right?” Entice Love, a 26-year-old sex worker, told The Guardian.

The group, on its website, offers a four-point rationale for supporting Clinton: her defense of ObamaCare; her foreign policy experience; her support for agencies “that protect the public’s health”; and even her opposition to “supply side economics.”

Their website looks like it was designed using only software available while Bill Clinton was president, an era hookers apparently remember fondly:

Bill Clinton presided over the most prosperous time in Bunny Ranch history, which coincided with a tax increase on the wealthiest Americans such as brothel owner Dennis Hof. The Bunnies recognize that thriving economies are built from the bottom up, where the vast majority of their clients originate. A return to relying on the disproven theory of trickle-down economics would only serve to exclude the vast majority of hard-working Bunny Ranch clients from having the discretionary income to enjoy with their favorite Bunny.

And you know who likes all this the most:

Proof-positive this campaign’s already made Hillary dog tired

Team Clinton isn’t taking any demographic for granted now that Sanders is giving her such a big challenge. With the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show going on for the next couple of days, Hillary is courting the canine-lovers demographic, but this is so off-putting that it might chase voters away while the dogs come running:

My dog flipped out for quite a while after I played that.

This is the best remix I’ve seen so far:

Bill Clinton says if he weren’t married he could speak more freely (his mistresses agree)

Bill Clinton turned a final New Hampshire event into a confessional:

In his last appearance before the primary here on Tuesday, former President Bill Clinton said he wishes “sometimes” that he wasn’t married to Hillary Clinton because then he could speak more freely.

“Sometimes when I am on a stage like this, I wish that we weren’t married, then I could say what I really think,” Bill Clinton said before introducing his wife at a rally. “I don’t mean that in a negative way. I am happy.”

Did he just blame his wife for his serial lying?

Have any other candidates’ spouses said they wish they weren’t married so they could speak their minds more freely? I think he did just speak his mind freely but doesn’t know it.

Being married has blocked Bill’s ability to speak openly, but it doesn’t seem to have impeded his dating life. Go figure.

Progressive thought experiment: If a Dorito is spotted at the next NARAL meeting, is it a hate crime?

During the Super Bowl on Sunday night, the abortion fanatics at NARAL really showed that they know how to party:

The pro-choice organization NARAL livetweeted their thoughts during the Super Bowl Sunday, at one point denouncing a Doritos ad for featuring a fetus.

The Doritos ad in question showed a father eating Doritos while his pregnant wife received an ultrasound. The baby reacts strongly to the Doritos whenever Dad gets close with a chip. At the end, the baby physically launches itself out of the womb to try to get Doritos.

These people are straight-up freaky:

The ad humanized a human being? How offensive!

NARAL would have obviously preferred it if fetus had been chopped up and sold off piece by piece.

Hillary wins Iowa along with 6 straight coin flips, Trump feeling unappreciated

Hillary Clinton squeaked by in Iowa last night. The vote was so close that in several precincts the winner had to be decided by a coin toss, but the “luck of the Clintons” still shines on them:

Not only that, but after each coin toss, the Clintons invested each flipped quarter in cattle futures and turned them into a few hundred thousand dollars.

On the GOP side, Ted Cruz beat Donald Trump and Marco Rubio by several thousand votes.

Trump’s speech last night was actually fairly gracious, but it was inevitable that he’d start taking it out on voters at some point:

That’s just one notch above, “voters, you’re fired!”


Remember when I said Trump was fairly gracious after losing to Cruz? That didn’t last long: