Planned Parenthood president secures induction to Self-Unawareness Hall of Fame

No words.

Cecile Richards is retiring as president of Planned Parenthood, and that’s a good thing because there’s no way she could possibly top this:

Holy s**t, I’ve got no words.

Wokest president EVER? Starbucks founder ponders run for prez, possibly opening WH bathrooms to all

You’ve got to give this guy some chutzpah points for allowing his company to cave to the social justice crowd and then immediately grabbing a parachute to bail the hell out. Next stop, the presidency?

In an interview with The Times, Schultz, a Democrat who has publicly criticized President Donald Trump, did not deny speculation that he was considering a political career.
[…]
Starbucks’ founder and executive chairman Howard Schultz is stepping down.

Schultz, who previously served as the coffee giant’s CEO, is leaving his position at the end of June, The New York Times reported on Monday.

In an interview with The Times, Schultz, a Democrat who has publicly criticized U.S. President Donald Trump, did not deny speculation that he was considering a political career.

So far Schultz’s early slogan of “Nobody understands the struggles of the middle class like the guy who built a politically-correct corporate behemoth by charging them six bucks for a cup of coffee” isn’t inspiring confidence that his campaign would catch on.

That said, the “White House bathrooms are open to everybody” policy would be interesting to watch unfold:

Bill Clinton: Hey, I was victimized by Bill Clinton too!

Bill’s the kind of guy who would punch you in the face and then later criticize you for not praising his support for ice packs.

Bill Clinton’s doing interviews to promote a novel he co-authored with James Patterson, but during a line of questioning on the “Today Show,” Bubba was asked about Monica Lewinsky. This answer from Bill is such vintage Clinton that it should be bottled and stored in a wine cellar:

Bill “left the presidency $16 million in debt” as a result of all that. He was a victim too, y’all — and cigars ain’t cheap! Wow, the cojones on that answer were big even by Bill Clinton standards.

And how about Clinton’s “I hired more women than everybody else” retort? I don’t think that’s quite the defense he thinks it is.

Seriously, this guy still got it (and by “it” I mean ZERO sense of shame):

And Bill’s buddy Harvey Weinstein heartily agrees!

Bill Clinton’s the kind of guy who would punch you in the face and then later criticize you for not praising his support for ice packs.

Plot twist in novel Bill Clinton co-authored was called by SNL over 20 years ago

Maybe Bubba owes some idea royalties to the writer of “The American President”

Bill Clinton is credited as co-authoring the new James Patterson thriller “The President is Missing,” and not to spoil anything for those who might read it, but there’s this twist:

Well jeez, Saturday Night Live made Bubba’s interest in that sort of plot twist known all the way back in 1995:

Maybe Clinton and Patterson owe some idea royalties to the writer of “The American President” (and, now that I think about it, that particular episode of SNL, as well as “Independence Day”).

(h/t Twitchy)

Helpful! Maureen Dowd sums up Obama perfectly

And liberals call TRUMP the totalitarian wannabe?

In Maureen Dowd’s new column in the New York Times, titled “Obama, just too good for us,” revolves around Ben Rhodes’ upcoming book, we find this:

Obama did not like persuading people to do what they didn’t want to do. And that is the definition of politics. He wanted them simply to do what he had ascertained to be right.

You know, Dowd isn’t wrong about Obama, though I’m sure she intended that as a compliment. He much preferred force over persuasion, as his administration’s track record proves. Team Obama would even gladly punch nuns in the face if they weren’t falling in line:

Also, how many new regulations did the president who “did not like persuading people to do what they didn’t want to do” enact to strong arm the private sector?

Obama wanted people “simply to do what he had ascertained to be right” — and the liberal Resistance calls TRUMP the totalitarian wannabe?

It’s a socialist world after all: Bernie Sanders fights for Vermonters by protesting wages at Disneyland 3,000 miles away

That look you get in your eye when you’re trying to get your hands on somebody else’s money.

Bernie Sanders is 76 years old, but his senses are still strong — especially his ability to smell money, even if it’s almost 3,000 miles from the state he’s paid to represent:

Vermont Sen. Bernie Sanders is meeting with workers and activists in Southern California on Saturday, just days prior to the state’s June 5 primary election.

The former Democratic presidential hopeful kicked off his tour at a rally and roundtable with Disneyland Resort employees in Anaheim, where unions are pushing legislation to increase wages for hospitality workers. The event got underway at 10 a.m. inside the River Church Arena.

Sanders lent his support to “union leaders pushing a ballot measure that would require businesses that have received subsidies from the city to raise wages to $15 an hour by 2019,” a news release from his office read.

For some reason Sanders didn’t tell workers he thinks are underpaid how to stretch a buck farther, which a socialist “public servant” with three homes should certainly know something about.

And no, Sanders didn’t get too worked up at the thought of helping divide up Disney’s abundance, why do you ask?

That look you get in your eye when you’re trying to get your hands on somebody else’s money.

Kim Jong Un reminds Trump of N. Korea’s ability to deliver Mother of All Envelopes

Kim Jong Un’s people might be starving, oppressed and subject to imprisonment in labor camps, but his rep Kim Jong Chol showed President Trump at the White House that their huge envelope industry is alive and well, and they’re not afraid to use it:

I half expected Kim Jong Un to pop out of the envelope as Trump opened it.

Nancy Pelosi indicates Dems have settled on bold midterm strategy of running against a good economy

The new jobs report out this morning indicates new hiring was in the positive by several hundred thousand jobs, and the unemployment rate is the lowest it’s been in decades. Given that, what’s a desperate Dem to do with midterms just around the corner? Nancy Pelosi leads the way in helping Dems run against an improving economy:

Hit the “translate from Pelosi BS into English” button on those comments and you get this: “You’re better off these days without a job.”

With brilliant campaign strategy like that, the Dems are a LOCK in November… to remain in the congressional minority.