Newt Gingrich is using secret racist encryption and Jackson Lee — dumbest member of Congress 17 years running — has cracked the code:

Democratic Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee on Friday accused Newt Gingrich of using racial “code words” in calling President Barack Obama the “food stamp president” and saying schools ought to hire children to do janitorial work.

The Texas congresswoman’s comments came in response to a question about remarks she made on the House floor Wednesday, when she said there are “candidates like Newt Gingrich who want to throw fuel and matches and fire to develop sort of an explosiveness in this country” and there are “underlying suggestions” to calling Obama the “food stamp president.”

“These are code words. It’s inappropriate,” Jackson Lee told MSNBC’s Martin Bashir Friday. “Let me say that the code words, as far as I’m concerned words that generate and signify race.”

And “Sheila Jackson Lee” is poorly disguised code for “pathetic race baiter.”

I’m not sure why people like Sheila Jackson Lee assume that calling Obama the “food stamp president” is racist considering that half of all people on food stamps are white.

For her skill at decrypting enemy code, I was going to refer to Jackson Lee as a “human enigma machine” but she’d probably think that was a racial slur, so I won’t:

There is one issue on which Sheila Jackson Lee and I agree completely: Her constituents are idiots. For evidence we need look no further than the fact that they keep re-electing Sheila Jackson Lee.

(h/t The Blaze)

No, seriously:

“That use of the name ‘Juan,’ the way he did it. You can’t argue these things. You either see them or you don’t. It’s just the way he did that. I sensed a little applause when he said ‘Let me help you’ when he answered the Juan question. It’s in the eye of the beholder.”

Oh. My. God. It’s as if the civil rights movement was waged for nothing! There’s no more convincing evidence that this country has a long way to go when it comes to equal rights and race relations than a white presidential candidate going on national television and referring to a man of a different color by his first name.

Here’s the exchange in question. Of course, the real problem Matthews has with this is that Newt completely blew the liberal argument out of the water, but when someone on your side has been completely dismantled, it’s time to bring on the accusations of racism:

They carried what’s supposed to be a big octopus made of recycled plastic that’s represents the tentacles of greed or whatever. The end result looks like something a bunch of stoners would have designed for the homecoming float at Purple Kush High School:

I’m particularly fond of the Occupier wearing a t-shirt advertising Harley Davidson, which of course is publicly traded on Wall Street.

(h/t Weasel Zippers)

As evidence, here’s an article from The Canadian that first appeared on January 8, 2007:

The science is settled… Gorebots are nuts.

Happy New Year to all of you who were lucky enough to somehow survive the great global warming induced pre-2012 semi-extinction of mankind!

It was a gruesome accident May 22: A truck driver lost control and his rig carrying 36 cows partially tipped over on an overpass along Interstate Highway 80 near Hazel Crest, sending some of the animals plunging about 25 feet onto Interstate Highway 294.

The death toll totaled 16 head of cattle, including one badly injured animal that police shot to end its suffering.

An animal-rights group now wants the Illinois Department of Transportation to erect an official roadside memorial sign. It would serve as a tribute to the victims, according to People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, which also seeks installation of a second memorial to six cows killed in traffic after they were thrown from a truck that overturned on Oct. 14 near Cambridge, Ill.

The DoT could easily make PETA go away by telling them that the cows were wearing ::gulp:: fur coats. But since this is Illinois we’re talking about — the California of the Midwest — the state will probably actually entertain the request and maybe even end up making lactose intolerance a hate crime.