This is what happens if you crash the crease when Teresa’s in goal:

Hockey is a rough sport; just ask Senator John Kerry, D-Mass.

The senator was attending a ceremony for his hometown hockey team, the Boston Bruins, at the White House today when he publicly debuted the remnants of his own hockey injury.

Kerry appeared to have two black eyes and a swollen nose. His senate office said the black and blue was caused by a nose injury during a hockey game the senator participated in recently.

“He’s totally fine,” Kerry spokeswoman Whitney Smith told ABC News, “Very ironically he busted his nose recently playing ice hockey, so the Bruins can certainly relate.”

The good news is that Kerry now thinks he’s a lock for another Purple Heart.

Update: ZIP has a better photo. Thurston looks like he’s been on a three-day caviar & Chataeu Lafite bender.

Joe Paterno, the iconic former Penn State football coach whose legend was tarnished when he was fired in the aftermath of the Jerry Sandusky scandal, has died, his family confirmed Sunday. He was 85.

Doctors had said Saturday that Paterno’s condition had become ”serious” in recent days after he experienced complications from lung cancer.

The winningest major-college football coach of all time with 409 victories and two national titles, Paterno was diagnosed shortly after Penn State’s Board of Trustees ousted him Nov. 9 following the child sex-abuse charges against Sandusky, his former assistant.

On top of that, tonight is “country music night” at the White House:

The Obamas will play host to a string of country stars — legendary and contemporary — Monday at their seventh “In Performance at the White House” program.

Among those performing Monday night: Lauren Alaina, The Band Perry, Dierks Bentley, Alison Krauss, Kris Kristofferson, Lyle Lovett, Mickey, Darius Rucker and James Taylor.

Some of the performers also will take part in an afternoon workshop at the White House for 120 local students about the history of country music and its cultural significance.

What? No Hank Williams Jr.?

DNC polling data must have come in showing that Obama is at risk of completely losing the “bitter clinger” vote. Next thing you know President Obama will pause in the middle of his next speech to put in a dip of Skoal.

ST. LOUIS (KMOX) – Was President Barack Obama too busy watching the “Operation Repo” marathon or something else last Friday night?

When KMOX host Charlie Brennan asked now-retired St. Louis Cardinals manager Tony La Russa how the traditional call of congratulations from the White House went, La Russa suddenly realized that…it never happened.

“That’s a good point, I hadn’t really even thought about that,” replied a surprised-sounding La Russa, who can be forgiven for having a few other things on his mind over the past week. “As we were getting into the World Series we had a call from the White House to make sure they had the correct number for my office.”

Why wouldn’t Obama have called Tony La Russa and the Cardinals to congratulate them? Maybe he was busy playing golf or shouting “pass this jobs bill” from the window of a Canadian-made bus… but still, Obama usually isn’t one to miss a prime-time opportunity. He recently took the time to host the Chicago Bears for a title they won 25 years ago, for cryin’ out loud. I wonder what gives.

It wouldn’t be because Tony La Russa is a Tea Party backer and a supporter of Arizona’s immigration law, would it?

While we try to figure out why in the world Obama hasn’t yet called to congratulate the Cardinals manager, let’s watch Tony La Russa present Albert Pujols with the “Hope Award” at Glenn Beck’s “Restoring Honor” gathering last summer:

Thought of any possible reasons why Obama wouldn’t have called the Cardinals yet? Me neither.

If for no other reason, you’d think Obama would have made the call because the Republicans barely carried the state in 2008 and he might need it this time around.

(h/t Gateway Pundit)

A reader named Pat from Texas just emailed this to rub it in:

I could be really childish by responding, “Oh yeah, look at Detroit vs. Dallas in the NFL standings!” But I won’t because that would be immature.

Update: The Tigers live to see another day!