Jeb Bush to Sign "Restaurants I'll Never Eat At" Bill

It would appear that humanity, at least in Florida, is going to the dogs:

Dogs may soon be allowed to accompany their owners out to dinner.

Gov. Jeb Bush says that on Friday he will sign a ‘dining with dogs’ bill. The legislation gives local governments the OK to let restaurants permit dogs to eat with their owners in outdoor dining areas.

The measure would create a three-year pilot program after which time the state would revisit the issue to determine whether it was a good idea.

Let me get this straight, you can’t have a cigar at many of these places, but it’s okay for a dog to take a dump three feet from my appetizer tray?

The “dining with dogs” legislation, which I refer to as the “restaurants I’ll never eat at bill”, will probably be revisited before the three years are up. Why? To apply a legal exemption for Korean restaurants, where a “table for four” sits down, and by the end of the night, only two leave.

All joking aside, people who feel the need to take their dogs everywhere need to be discouraged, not encouraged. If you’re not blind, you shouldn’t have a dog in tow, or vice-versa, more than a short period of time. You might love them, and that’s great. I have a dog too, but I sure as hell don’t take it to Bennigans with me. If you’re dying to eat with your dog, great, then get on your hands and knees and share a bowl of Kibbles n’ Bits with Rover.

True, dogs are called “man’s best friend”, but, with a few isolated exceptions, our best friends don’t pee on the sidewalk and hump our legs while we’re trying to finish a cheeseburger. They don’t do it to the people at the next table, either.

The upside to the “dining with dogs” act is for Courtney Love, who will soon be able to legally enter Florida restaurants.


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Author: Doug Powers

Doug Powers is a writer, editor and commentator covering news of the day from a conservative viewpoint with an occasional shot of irreverence and a chaser of snark. Townhall Media writer/editor. alum. Bowling novice. Long-suffering Detroit Lions fan. Contact: