Pliocene Tortoises Driving SUV’s and other Global Warming Conundrums

There’s yet another doomsday warning out concerning human created global warming.

I’m no scientist, but this latest panic report contains an assumption that doesn’t seem to make sense.

Here’s how the story begins:

The planet’s temperature has climbed to levels not seen in thousands of years, warming that has begun to affect plants and animals, researchers report in Tuesday’s issue of The National Academy of Sciences.

The Earth has been warming at a rate of 0.36 degree Fahrenheit per decade for the last 30 years, according to the research team led by James Hansen of NASA’s Goddard Institute for Space Studies in New York.

Then later…

“This evidence implies that we are getting close to dangerous levels of human-made pollution,” Hansen said in a statement.

James Hansen, for those who are lucky enough to be ignorant of nth-degree meteorology and climatology, is the Chuck Yeager of the global warming theory and even makes Al Gore look like a paper hat clad trainee at “We’re All Gonna Die Burger.”

Anyway, here’s the kicker:

“If further global warming reaches 2 or 3 degrees Celsius, we will likely see changes that make Earth a different planet than the one we know. The last time it was that warm was in the middle Pliocene, about 3 million years ago, when sea level was estimated to have been about 25 meters (80 feet) higher than today,” Hansen said.

First of all, any time I see the word “estimated” in a scientific report, I get curious. If you don’t think it’s a big deal, try using the word on your taxes and see how long you’re allowed to get away with it.

Also, if it was that warm 3 million years ago in the middle of the Pliocene epoch, how then can we automatically conclude that the same global temperatures in Hansen’s doomsday scenario would be cause by human pollution? During the Pliocene, were sharks driving SUV’s, tortoises operating factories spewing smoke into the air, and plankton using aerosol hairspray?

Why does it matter what’s causing the warming? The last thing we need is another power grab and money grub for a bogus reason.

The history of the world is marked with “eras.” There was the Paleoarchian, the Paleoproterozoic, the Mesozoic, the Palaeozoic, etc.

I have a feeling that, thousands of years from now, the slice of the Cenozoic era in which which we’re now living might be referred to in science textbooks as the “Chicken Little epoch.”



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Author: Doug Powers

Doug Powers is a writer, editor and commentator covering news of the day from a conservative viewpoint with an occasional shot of irreverence and a chaser of snark. Townhall Media writer/editor. alum. Bowling novice. Long-suffering Detroit Lions fan. Contact: