Cool: Palintologists Starting to Lose Their F’in Minds

The same root weevils who didn’t seem to care as much about Bill Clinton’s medical records, Hillary’s records as First Lady, or about Barack Obama’s past associations with admitted terrorists, are going full-blown bat guano because Sarah Palin’s people won’t turn over to them every aspect of her life for full examination, up to and including a detailed inspection of her panty drawer.

There haven’t been this many worms crawling around Palin’s neck of Alaska’s woods since since the delivery truck for the Wasilla Bait Shop overturned on Highway 3.

Here’s a list of what the Palintologists are trying to dig up, and why they’re frustrated that Palin doesn’t just open up the door and invite them in.

If they’re so damn curious about Palin’s secrets, why don’t they just hack into her email? What? Oh, nevermind.

So crazy is Palin driving them that she can’t even wear a white outfit without some leftist accusing her of blatantly inciting racists. This from the party that keeps re-electing Klan relics like Robert Byrd. The lunacy is out of control. How come nobody bothers to ask what message Obama’s sending when he wears a black suit?

Update: The “quote of the day” comes to us from ardent Obama supporter Camille Paglia:

“One of the most idiotic allegations batting around out there among urban media insiders is that Palin is “dumb.” Are they kidding? What level of stupidity is now par for the course in those musty circles? (The value of Ivy League degrees, like sub-prime mortgages, has certainly been plummeting. As a Yale Ph.D., I have a perfect right to my scorn.) People who can’t see how smart Palin is are trapped in their own narrow parochialism — the tedious, hackneyed forms of their upper-middle-class syntax and vocabulary.”

Yes, Camille, but this intelligence is one artifact the aforementioned Palintologists will never be able to turn up no matter how aggressively they dig because their pick axe is so incredibly dull.

Author: Doug Powers

Doug Powers is a writer, editor and commentator covering news of the day from a conservative viewpoint with an occasional shot of irreverence and a chaser of snark. Townhall Media writer/editor. alum. Bowling novice. Long-suffering Detroit Lions fan. Contact: