United Nations Security Chickens Out

Why should the UN have a say in any security issue when they can’t even keep a Colonel Sanders lookalike out of their own building?

UNITED NATIONS — Red-faced United Nations officials on Monday admitted to a major security lapse after a UN guard helped Kentucky Fried Chicken’s “Colonel Sanders” gain access to restricted areas.

The guard escorted the white-suited intruder past security barriers, where he got a handshake from the UN General Assembly president, Dr. Ali A. Treki of Libya.

The UN responded to the breach in their typical harsh language:

“It should not have happened — that I will stress, and very strongly,” said Michele Montas, spokeswoman for UN Secretary General Ban Ki-moon.

And if it happens again, they’ll stress it very very strongly — but let’s hope it doesn’t come to that. A strongly-worded letter is en route to KFC as we speak to demand that the company apologize… to Pamela Anderson.

U.N. officials managed to get the Colonel to go away, but only after they’d given him most of Czechoslovakia in return.


Fortunately, meeting faux Colonel Sanders was on Treki’s “bucket list,” so he wasn’t too upset — plus the Colonel brought free chicken

Author: Doug Powers

Doug Powers is a writer, editor and commentator covering news of the day from a conservative viewpoint with an occasional shot of irreverence and a chaser of snark. Townhall Media writer/editor. MichelleMalkin.com alum. Bowling novice. Long-suffering Detroit Lions fan. Contact: WriteDoug@Live.com.