Settled Science: Republicans More Likely Than Democrats to Achieve Orgasm

My own theory why Democrats have more trouble orgasming is that the solar panel arrays on their vibrators can make the experience rather cumbersome:

Republicans are more likely to have better sex than Democrats, according to a new, 5,000-subject survey released by Binghamton University and on Friday.

More than half – 53% – of those identifying themselves as single, conservative Republicans said they reached orgasm almost every time they have sex. That’s compared to just 40% of liberal Democrats.

That said, the survey also found that Democrats have sex more frequently — possibly due to screwing taxpayers with greater efficiency.

Note: The “Republicans orgasm more than Democrats” poll has a margin of error of plus or minus Bill Clinton.

Author: Doug Powers

Doug Powers is a writer, editor and commentator covering news of the day from a conservative viewpoint with an occasional shot of irreverence and a chaser of snark. Townhall Media writer/editor. alum. Bowling novice. Long-suffering Detroit Lions fan. Contact: